2016 advice dating dating chronicles relationships

Back Down Memory Lane

I was talking to Mr. C the other night about relationships and such and he was like “Never mind, I don’t want you going back down memory lane.” I laughed. I responded, “Really?” He answered, “Yep, I don’t want you reminiscing and calling the dude talking about  – you remember when…” I couldn’t stop laughing.

memory-lane

But, I started thinking about what he said and wondered was it a bad thing to go down memory lane? Is it wrong to reminisce about someone from your past or just to think about how good things were when you two were together? Aren’t memories just that? Memories?

In my opinion I think that there’s nothing wrong with remembering good times about a relationship. Especially when that person and relationship had a profound affect on you. Whether it changed who you were, what you thought or taught you a lesson, remembering that is good for you. The thing is that there is a reason that you’re not with that person. Alas the bad.

Something happened and you two aren’t together. It could have been another woman, man, death, a move or just plain incompatibility. Whatever the reason is that you’re not together there’s nothing wrong with remembering. It’s just problematic when you want to call the other person and reconnect over old times. To reminisce about something to the point you want to try it again.

Trust me when I say this…There is no man in my life that I want to go back and try again. Heck I’m sure they feel the same. We didn’t make it for a reason. I’m thankful for the experiences and lessons and I don’t spend my time looking in the rear view mirror when I’m trying to go forward. I don’t go backwards no matter how great the memory.

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Disclaimer: I own no rights to these photos. I found them doing a Google search.

 

16 comments

  1. This is really good insight. I also agree wholeheartedly– I know reminiscing on the cherished memories of a relationship is good for the one’s soul. Likewise, no harm is done if you have no other ulterior motive behind conjuring up those memories. ♥ As always great thoughts Queen.

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  2. So true! Especially the fact that I don’t want none of em back! lol But most have taught me something about myself, or have made me realize something about myself. Good stuff!

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  3. You can’t help looking back. And if reminiscing on good times feels good, you should do it because it raises your vibration. Replaying the bad thoughts and memories over and over again does not feel good and doesn’t serve the new and evolving relationship you’re aspiring to. Chances are the person you’re with doesn’t want to hear it and that’s cool. His memories are his too.

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  4. At this age in life we all have some kind of baggage/relationship history. There’s nothing wrong with discussing something positive that might have happened at one time with your ex. I’m dating someone who is divorced and had two children together. Occasionally something is going to trigger a memory for either of us and the story to tell. In our cases we both know our exes belong in the maximum security ward of a sanitarium, but you can’t undo history. I’m sure you weren’t going on in graphic detail piece by piece of whatever triggered the memory. From the guys P.O.V. as long as your aren’t 24-7 harping on the ex, I get it.

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