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6 Dating Mistakes Women Make

Tikeetha TMby
38 Comments on 6 Dating Mistakes Women Make

This is a roll call to all the women out there who’ve made mistakes while dating. You date men only to find out that the man you thought was the one was in fact a dud. You start to review the reel of your relationship no matter how small or insignificant in your head. You start to wonder “Where did I go wrong?” Has that ever happened to you?

It’s happened to me. I’m not ashamed to admit it. I made plenty of mistakes while dating and I’m the first to say “Learn from my mistakes”. I want to save you time and trouble while you navigate this dating world.

So, I compiled a list of 6 dating mistakes that women make in hopes that I’m able to help you recognize if you’re making them too. If you’re doing any of these things, I beg you love to run for the hills and stop it. Take a dating hiatus and get back to the basics of loving and dating you.

  1. I gave the benefit of the doubt. This was a big one for me. I gave the benefit of the doubt to a lot of men who frankly didn’t deserve it. The thing is that they were showing me who they were and telling me something different. I listened to their words instead of their action. That is a big no-no. Maya Angelou said it best “When someone shows you who they are believe them; the first time.”
  2. No boundaries. I used to allow the men that I dated to set my boundaries. Sure, you can call me for a last minute date. Sure, I can come over at 11pm. Sure, I can take you there. Sure, I can (fill in the blank). You see what I was doing? I wasn’t setting boundaries. There are rules to anything including dating me and I didn’t set or express my boundaries. I was trying to be a free spirit. That’s not me. Be you and set those boundaries.
  3. Something is better than nothing. Umm, no it’s not. We shouldn’t settle. I refuse to waste anymore time with people that aren’t worthy. Why are you settling for less than what you deserve? Some of us are so happy to have a piece of a man that we are willing to settle for a piece than the whole person. That’s a lie and one you should stop telling yourself right now. You deserve it all love. Nothing is better than something that causes you pain.
  4. Waste my time. Time is a big thing for me. It matters. More than money. Time is something that I can’t get back. You can always make more money. You can’t get back time once its wasted. That is a big thing. I wasted my time with men that I knew we could never be nothing more. I’m not talking the first couple of dates. I’m talking the first couple of months. I just continued to waste my time instead of putting them in the block category and moving on. Life is too short to waste time with anyone.
  5. Lowering my standards. I’m not going to lower my standards when it comes to dating men and neither should you. Why should you? So, you can have a man? This goes hand in hand with number 3. Don’t lower your standards or expectations in a relationship just so you can get or keep a man. If he can’t meet you where you are, move on girl!
  6. Giving up the cookies too soon. Mr. C and I are practicing abstinence, but I know that not everyone is at that point in their life and I respect that. However, I tell you this…if a man is not willing to wait for you he is not the man for you. I heard a man once say that if a man can wait for a pair of shoes, a new video game or a promotion he can wait to have sex. You see that? Men will wait. You just have to be diligent in your desire to know that you are worth the wait. It’s okay to walk away if a man tells you that he won’t wait. Nothing wrong with saying “Okay, well be blessed and bye”. You are worth the wait. Real men know that.

Those are my 6 dating mistakes and trust me, I’ve made them all. I’m not judging you. I’m trying to help you move beyond the present and envision a future where you’ve got the love you want. It is possible.

Any other dating mistakes you think women make? How do you feel about the list? Have you made these mistakes?

 

Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links: Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.

38 comments

  1. You have right Tikeetha. I also did all 6 mistakes and i learnt on harder way. And i repeat them. The point is, listen the voice of logic. If he can’t wait for benefits, he thinks you are toy. We women sometimes learn differences in the moment when right guy appears, but until then we swallow shits.

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  3. I concur more so on giving up the cookie too fast is what the current generation is up to. I have been in situation ships where the dude wants my cookie ASAP and when I say no they either angry/cheat. So I realized those kinda men are assholes. I better keep my cookie jar closed for the right guy

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    1. Absolutely. I truly believe that you can do it too. I never thought that I would be here, but I am. What I tell women is that if he really wants to get to know you and date you exclusively then he will wait. You can figure out a lot about a man just by not giving him sex.

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  4. I am loving this series about dating tips! While reading this one though, tip #6 gave me a flash back to a guy I was only momentarily interested in. We matched well “on paper” as they say, and while talking online (we met through an online site) I was very open about my beliefs and waiting. And the instant I knew I was over him was, after only talking for 2 days, when he said “well I know if you’re belief but I shouldn’t have to beg. I’m not the kind of guy to cheat but..” and I was like “umm no…..buh-bye”. The strange thing was that afterwards he turned into a 5-year old saying “but we are so perfect for each other, let’s not give up on this!” when he basically just told me if I wasn’t going to have sex with him not to be surprised if he found it some place else.

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      1. Yeah exactly! I didn’t even end up meeting him. It took me 2 weeks to get him to stop texting me telling me how much we “belong” together and all that. So happy he’s gone now haha

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  5. I love the list. I would add to the #7 if you give an ultimatum be willing to follow through if he doesn’t pick you. They won’t take you seriously if you back peddle.
    I met my husband 10 years ago in 3rd year of university. I knew I wanted a committed relationship (no flings) as I was getting older but I didn’t set my boundaries early enough. After a few months we had a talk about what our relationship meant. He said he didn’t believe in “labels” and that made me mad. I froze him out for a bit to figure my ish out and then came back to him with an ultimatum. Either we were in a relationship or we were done. I told him I do believe in labels and we could remain friends ( nothing more) but the intimacy would stop as I was looking for more.
    That was 10 years ago and I joke with him about that now from time to time.
    My point is if a guy likes you enough he will stay. He may continue to test your boundaries ( I know my hubby did) but if you continue to respect yourself and not back peddle, you so be alright either way.

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  6. Amen to these tips sister! I’m currently going through #1 myself and have finally realized there is no relationship there and it’s time to move on. Actions always speak louder than words.

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  8. Definitely have struggled with the boundaries and the something is better than nothing one. I didn’t even know what boundaries were for a long time and that stemmed from childhood. Also you get lonely and being single for a long time can be frustrating and depressing when we are created for relationship. BUT… I learned the hard way that settling for something so you won’t be lonely has a whole notha set of problems! And it can be like a slap in the face when it doesn’t work out bc now you’ve settled for nothing!

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    1. My girlfriend posted this on FB that spoke to my spirit and I believe that we should all know and accept this truth: Dear WOMAN,
      He’s going to come. The one who’s going to make u feel like everyone else was just practice. He’ll love ur mind first..heart second..& ur body always. He’ll prove to u trust isn’t just a word..that love isn’t just a feeling — but will u be ready? There is nothing worse than having a king on ur doorstep, while ur in bed with & entertaining a joker!! #realtalk #lemmeblessaWOMANrightnow #bewhatuseek

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  11. Hi Tikeetha! This is Interesting. Although, I am a man I made an effort to read your post because I’m curious about the struggles that women face. I think these lessons are incredibly valuable because it’ll save them time and heartaches. Great job!

    And I also want to respond to your request about what else to add to this content. I suggest “Lack of Self Respect”. Girls who don’t respect themselves can’t expect guys to treat them seriously. Girls who sleep around with different guys who’s not even their boyfriends, definitely don’t view their bodies as a temple of holy spirit.

    It’s a big red flag for guys who are serious, have high standard and who are looking for a woman to treat as their queen. Because girls like these are not built for serious relationship, they are built for temporary pleasure because thats the only way they know how to run a relationship.

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    1. Thank you so much for commenting and you’re absolutely right. If you can’t respect yourself, how can you expect someone else. So true. We need to teach our young women to honor their bodies. I’ve talked about that before about how when I was growing up I wasn’t taught that in church. Your body is a temple and you should honor it in everything: what you eat, wear, etc. Great point.

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  13. I fear that a lot of single women are told by all their girlfriends who happen to be in relationships that they are too fussy… When you believe this is when you start to slip up and make big dating disasters. If men can be fussy then so can you… How else do you expect to meet ‘the one’? Certainly not by settling for someone you aren’t 100% in to. Yes, Mr Perfect may not exist but you will find someone who’s imperfections are what you love most about them… And anyway… Don’t men like a women who knows what she wants?…

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