I had dinner a couple of nights ago with a friend of mine. It was great to catch-up. We hadn’t hung out in a few months and I needed to let him know the things that I was going through. He asked me about my relationship with Mr. C and I was gushing all over my man. We were talking about how we’ll be getting married in the fall of 2020 and he started laughing. He asked “Does he want to marry you?” I looked at him seriously “Absolutely. Why wouldn’t he? I’m pretty damn amazing. Hell, one of the main reasons that I want to wait is that I’m not ready to jump back into the wife role. Don’t you find me amazing?” He replied “Of course.”
Well it got me to thinking about how do you define yourself? Do you love yourself? I mean I don’t lack in self-esteem. Mama didn’t raise no fool. I may not be your cup of tea, but damn it I didn’t ask you to pick up my cup and take a sip. My tea is a strong like me and not all men can handle that. Some men actually prefer weak tea “aka weaker women”. Those men have moved out of the way to allow my love to walk with me.
See, I am not perfect. No one is. But, I’m a great woman and someday I’ll enter into being a great wife. It’s the steps that I’m taking now that are allowing me to march forward in my relationship without hesitation. You’ve got to do the same.
I love all my curves and the baby weight that I’m still carrying 9 years later. I love me. I love the way I blush when you ask me about Mr. C. A deep red, genuine blush because I can’t believe how blessed I am to have a man that God chose for me riding with me through this life. I’ve learned to love my nose. The weird nose that looks nothing like my family. I love it.
Beyond the physical though, I just want to tell you that I love myself. Through all the mental and physical attributes, scars and fresh cut wounds the absolute best thing about me is my strength. I’m a fighter. You don’t know? Read my post last week. Know that many men have tried to break me and none can or will.
My man loves my strength. No matter the adversity I keep fighting. I keep pushing forward. I keep surviving and thriving. That’s nothing but favor, love. God’s got and has kept me. So, Mr. C sees favor, strength and beauty all wrapped up into one when he sees me. He sees someone who made a vow to God, whose kept it and wants to honor Him as a couple. He sees a wonderful mother and friend. Why wouldn’t he want to marry me? I love me and I love him.
Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links: Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.
When I was dating Mr Potential, the sweet old granny I live with saw me and commented on my weight. I have been losing a lot lately and she goes “my dear! soon you will be a wisp of a thing. keep going down and in no time you will have a man on your arm!” she didn’t mean it in a disrespectful way, but I just laughed and told her I already had a man. I like how you say you may not be everyone’s cup of tea but you aren’t forcing anyone to pick you up and drink you. It’s so true. I get so many comments when I tell people I think I’m amazing because I actually *do* love myself and my personality. It’s so strange that it is engrained in us to fixate on things we hate about ourselves. Keep loving you, T! You are a phenomenal woman.
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Thanks sis. Yes, we have to love the things about us first before anyone else can love them. We have to change our mindset and encourage each other to love the skin that we’re in.
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I think men like confident women. I was insecure for a long time. Men hate it when you cling onto them and crave their attention 24/7. I’ve learned to let my boyfriend have his space and I see a difference! It’s like he’s all over me! Lol. I’ve learned to accept myself, flaws and all.
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And sometimes that’s all we can do is sit back and love the person looking back at us in the mirror and not worrying about what anyone else thinks
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Indeed! I love this post.
I think when you know who you are and share that with the world, it inspires others to do the same, or at least seek to find out. And that is beautiful.
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Yassssssss honey! I love everything about this post and can see myself in it! I have had my share of men try to break me too, I decided that they just did that out of lack of love for their selves and the fact that they couldn’t have me. Favor, strength and beauty, that describes me to a T!
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Yep you’d be surprised how many men are walking around with self-hate in their heart and then they’re trying to break other women. They need to know the joy and goodness of God.
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Yes so many men walking around with self-hate trying to break other women it’s sad they need to learn to love and Trust the Almighty because even in the midst of them trying to destroy what God created from their rib they will be unsuccessful
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So glad you love yourself and see the amazing person that you are! A strong and beautiful woman!
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Thanks Lynz
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most welcome, much love
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Strong story, you are blessed to learn to love yourself and share love with a man. Loving myself is my biggest accomplishment in life right now my smile is real I thank God.
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Yes Lord. He provides those who are meant to love us after the pain
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See….we need you to be teaching all the little girls of today this topic! I see tweener girls “competing” (spelling?) in cheer competitions in 4 layers of makeup and tiny little skirts. At the mall, they wear shorts that barely cover their behind and I want to shake them and tell them that succeeding in life isn’t about how pretty you can be. It’s about being a leader, loving your body, developing a sense of humor and being strong. I don’t know. I’m trying to raise sons to value these important characteristics of women. That’s all you can do when you have boys. You know?
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Yes! This right here is the truth: It’s about being a leader, loving your body, developing a sense of humor and being strong. I don’t know. I’m trying to raise sons to value these important characteristics of women.
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You can find me somewhere between dancing in my cubicle to the beat of such a powerful piece, and trying not to tear up like I do when I read such power magnificence, eh *STRUGGLE LIFE!* ♥ Sending you so much love and admiration Sis!
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Thanks sis!
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Always! ❤
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