Is Spanking Wrong?

Recently, I heard that a parent had disciplined their child and videotaped it and put it on YouTube. I was appalled. Why would you do that? What was more disturbing was the fact that the little boy was only seven years old. He shaved his head, threatned him with a belt, made him do push-ups and run drills in a boot camp manner. He never spanked him on video, but you could hear him speaking loudly and the child crying out in anguish in what sounds like he was being attacked. This man is behind bars thanks to his ignorance and for officials locking up this child abuser. It was later discovered that this man is not even the child’s biological father. No blood relation. He is a “mentor” who was supposed to be helping the young boy. What kind of mentoring relationship was he developing through violence? This issue brought me back to the question we’ve been asking for years…is spanking wrong?

Do you spank your son? “Not yet, he’s only 3”. I remember being asked this question by another parent who wondered what my form of discipline with our 3 year old would be. My husband and I found ourselves on opposite sides of the spectrum when Brennan came a long. I didn’t want to spank him and Lee believed that spanking was a part of childhood. I’ve never been a fan of corporal punishment or “beatings”. As a child who grew up in the household of “spare the rod and spoil the child mentality” I felt that sometimes spankings were designed to hurt me and not to make me feel sorry for what I did. I felt sorry that I got caught. I think that as a parent you often struggle with whether or not spankings work. I believe that it is a personal choice. I don’t know how to raise your kids (only mine), but I do believe their is a definite line you should never cross…abuse. Throwing irons, chairs, shoes or items at your children to get them to “listen”is not healthy, sane or needed. Furthermore, it is child abuse.

I can’t tell you that spankings saved me from being a delinquent, crack head strung out on drugs and prostituting myself for loose change because I don’t believe that to be the case. There were many spankings I got that I can’t remember why I got them. I think when you strike a child out of anger, you lose your opportunity to have a civilized conversation with them. You teach them that striking out of anger is an acceptable way to deal with issues. I know that I will probably have to spank Brennan at some point, but it won’t be a toe taping, tail blazing spanking that I had as a child. Lee and I are a progressive couple in terms of our parents. We want to talk to Brennan first to confirm he knows what he did, get his side on why he did it and be firm with the consequences. I will get off my soap box for now, but I want to leave you with this: Parenting is a combination of love, strength, patience, prayer and discipline. Find what works best for you and doesn’t damage your child.

Check out the video of the gentelman who was arrested for this horrific act: