I was reading a couple of weeks ago about how the rapper, Future, was upset that his ex-fiancee, Ciara, had their son around her new man (also famous – an athlete). His response to Russell Wilson (the new man) pushing his son in his stroller:
“If I was a kid, and my mama had some dude pushing me, I would’ve jumped out the stroller and slapped the s–t out of him. You never do that in our community; you’ve only known this dude for a few months and bring him around your son, who does that?” Future asked.
Now, let me say this…you do what you want to do when you are co-parenting. Bam! There it is! We have to learn to check our emotions at the door if it is something we disagree with as long as it doesn’t harm our child. That’s it and that’s all. Why the fuss Future?
I mean, for you to insist that we never do that in our community insinuates that men (black) don’t do that on a regular now. A lot of black men (in our community) don’t see anything wrong with introducing their children to their new girlfriend. It doesn’t make them a bad person. Their choice and right as a parent. The problem isn’t the new man pushing your son around the problem is that your feelings are hurt. I get it. I’ve been there. But, I have no say and neither do you.
My son has never met someone that I was romantically involved with. I’m not even there yet. I wasn’t raised like that, but I don’t judge anyone who does. Your choice when you are parenting your children. I have the luxury of having a week off to date, but other men and women may not be as lucky. They may be full-time parents and therefore where they go their children go. No shade. Your choice.
So, can we please all take a seat and make sure that we stop trying to step on our ex’s happiness? If she’s a good mother or he’s a good father, then let it go. Move on Martha move on!