I’m Back! Six Years Later, and Oh, Do I Have a Point of View!

Well, well, well… look who decided to dust off her keyboard and return to the blogging world!

It’s been almost SIX years since I’ve shared my thoughts here, and let me tell you, LIFE HAS BEEN LIFING!

When I last wrote, I was a single mother raising a teenage son, navigating my career, figuring out relationships, and trying to make sense of this thing called life.

Fast-forward almost six years, and that teenage boy is now a college freshman at the University of Maryland Eastern Shore, majoring in Animal Science with dreams of becoming a veterinarian!

Yes, y’all, MUNCH IS IN COLLEGE!

The little boy I spent so many years raising, advocating for, worrying about, praying over, and preparing for the world is now out here figuring things out for himself.

And if you know anything about me, you know that raising Brennan has been one of the greatest joys, challenges, and accomplishments of my life.

But here’s something I’ve come to realize: While I was busy raising him, I was growing up, too.

And BABY, have I learned some things along the way!

Love Found Me Again

Oh, and did I mention that I GOT MARRIED?

Yep! In 2023, I married a man I first met in 2019. Our journey wasn’t exactly a straight line, but somehow life brought us back together.

I was 48 years old when we got married!

And let me tell you something funny. When people found out I was getting married at 48, I kept hearing the same thing:

“Girl, you’re so lucky you found love and got married at your age!”

LUCKY?!

Now, don’t get me wrong. I absolutely consider finding love again a blessing. But I found it interesting how many people viewed getting married at 48 as though I had somehow beaten the odds!

As if women approaching 50 should just be grateful that somebody still wants to marry us!

BABY, LET’S BE CLEAR! I wasn’t sitting around waiting for somebody to rescue me!

I had a career, a home, a child I was raising, a life I had built, and a pretty good understanding of who I was.

I wasn’t looking for someone to complete me. I wanted someone who could complement the life I had already created.

And there’s a difference!

Now, marriage the second time around, especially when you’re approaching 50, is a WHOLE different experience.

We’ve laughed, loved, learned, disagreed, and discovered that blending two lives and families requires a whole lot more than love.

It takes patience, communication, grace, compromise, and sometimes a really good marriage therapist!

And here’s something else I’ve learned:

Finding love after 40 might be a blessing, but sustaining a healthy marriage requires WORK!

Getting married wasn’t the finish line. It was the beginning of another journey of learning, growing, and sometimes unlearning things we brought into our marriage from previous relationships and life experiences.

But I’m learning. We’re learning.

And trust me, I have PLENTY of perspectives to share about finding love later in life, second marriages, blended families, and what it really means to build a partnership when you’re both bringing decades of experiences, expectations, and established habits into the relationship.

Because one thing I’ve discovered is that love after 40 isn’t about being lucky somebody chose you. It’s about two people choosing each other and continuing to make that choice every day.

There Has Been Loss, Too

Not everything over these past six years has been joyful.

My husband lost his mother in 2020, and I lost my grandmother in 2024. We’ve experienced other family losses along the way, and each one has been a reminder that life is precious, tomorrow isn’t promised, and the people we love won’t always be here.

Grief has a way of changing how you see the world.

It teaches you what matters, what doesn’t, and what simply isn’t worth your energy anymore.

And if there’s one thing I’ve learned about loss, it’s that life doesn’t stop just because you’re grieving.

You still have responsibilities. You still have people depending on you. You still have to show up, even on the days when your heart is heavy.

But I’ve also learned to give myself grace, lean into my faith, and appreciate the people who are still here.

Because tomorrow is not promised to any of us.

Careers, COVID, and a Whole Lot of Lessons!

And let’s not forget that somewhere in the middle of all this, we survived a GLOBAL PANDEMIC!

COVID changed the world, and it certainly changed how many of us approached our families, careers, relationships, and priorities.

I’ve navigated career changes, new jobs, new opportunities, professional growth, and yes, even a few UNHINGED supervisors along the way!

Because apparently, some people missed the leadership training AND the lesson on treating people with basic human decency.

But that’s another blog post for another day!

Through it all, I’ve continued growing professionally, personally, and spiritually.

My faith has become an even greater part of who I am.

I’ve learned to pray more, worry less (although I’m still working on that one), and recognize that sometimes God’s plans look nothing like the ones we made for ourselves.

I’ve also learned that every opportunity isn’t necessarily a blessing, every closed door isn’t a rejection, and sometimes God is protecting you from things you don’t even realize you need protection from.

And let’s be honest, sometimes the lesson comes wrapped in an experience you would NEVER voluntarily sign up for!

But somehow, here I am.

Still standing. Still learning. Still growing.

And Now I’m Over 50!

Here’s perhaps the biggest difference between the woman who started this blog and the woman writing today.

I’M OVER 50, Y’ALL!

And baby, my perspective has CHANGED!

I don’t have the same patience for foolishness. I don’t feel compelled to explain myself to everybody. I’ve learned that boundaries aren’t selfish, peace is priceless, and being the strong woman who holds everything together can be downright exhausting.

I’m learning that I don’t have to win every argument, fix every problem, or carry everybody else’s burdens.

And most importantly, I’m learning that I deserve to enjoy the life I’ve worked so hard to build.

For years, like so many women, I wore the title of strong Black woman like a badge of honor.

I could handle everything. Figure out everything. Fix everything. Take care of everybody.

And somewhere along the way, I started asking myself a very important question:

WHO TAKES CARE OF THE WOMAN WHO TAKES CARE OF EVERYBODY ELSE?

WHEW! Now that’s a conversation we need to have!

I’m at a stage in my life where I want peace. I want laughter. I want meaningful relationships. I want to travel, enjoy my husband, watch my son build his own life, and spend time doing things that genuinely make me happy.

I want the soft life I’ve spent decades hearing everybody talk about!

And that doesn’t mean I don’t want responsibilities or that I’m suddenly going to stop being the ambitious, opinionated woman I’ve always been.

It simply means I’m learning that I don’t have to be exhausted to prove my worth.

Does that mean I have everything figured out?

ABSOLUTELY NOT!

I’m still learning how to be a wife, how to parent an adult child, how to navigate a blended family, how to balance my career and personal life, and how to embrace this next chapter without feeling guilty about putting myself first sometimes.

But I will tell you this: The woman I am today has more wisdom, stronger boundaries, deeper faith, and a whole lot more life experience than the woman who last sat down to write on this blog.

And I actually LIKE the woman I’m becoming!

So, What Can You Expect From Me?

The same unapologetic honesty I’ve always brought, just with a few more gray hairs, a lot more wisdom, and perhaps a little less patience!

We’re going to talk about:

Love, marriage, and relationships after 50. Because finding love is one thing, but maintaining a healthy relationship is another!
Parenting adult children. Especially learning when to step back and let them figure things out for themselves.
Blended families. The good, the challenging, and the conversations nobody seems to want to have.
Faith, grief, healing, and personal growth. Because life will humble you whether you’re ready or not.
Careers, leadership, and workplace foolishness. Trust me, I have STORIES!
Boundaries, protecting our peace, and embracing a softer life. Because being everything to everybody is exhausting.
And whatever else happens to be on my mind!

Some of my perspectives might make you laugh. Others might make you uncomfortable. And occasionally, you might disagree with me completely.

AND THAT’S OKAY!

Because I’m not here to convince everybody to think like me.

I’m here to share my experiences, encourage conversations, challenge perspectives, and hopefully remind someone that they’re not alone in whatever season of life they’re navigating.

And let’s be clear about something: I reserve the right to change my mind!

Because if life has taught me anything, it’s that growth sometimes requires you to rethink things you once believed wholeheartedly.

Six years ago, I had plenty to say.

Today?

OH, I HAVE EVEN MORE!

Six Years Later… I’m Still Here!

I’ve loved. I’ve lost. I’ve cried. I’ve celebrated.

I’ve changed careers, raised a son, gotten married, strengthened my faith, survived a pandemic, experienced grief, and learned some hard lessons along the way.

I’ve had moments when life felt absolutely beautiful and others when I wondered what in the world God was trying to teach me.

But through every challenge, disappointment, blessing, and unexpected turn…

I’M STILL HERE!

A little older. A whole lot wiser. Still growing. Still learning. Still laughing. And still looking at life from my own unique perspective.

And perhaps that’s what makes returning to this blog so meaningful.

I’m not the same woman who stopped writing almost six years ago.

And honestly, I wouldn’t want to be.

So welcome back to my little corner of the internet.

Pull up a chair, grab your coffee (or your wine!), and let’s talk about life.

Because if these past six years have taught me anything, it’s that life doesn’t always go according to plan, but there’s always something to learn along the way.

And one thing about me hasn’t changed…

I may not always be right, but I ALWAYS have a Thomas Point of View!

Now tell me, what’s the biggest lesson LIFE has taught YOU over the past six years?