That’s what I was thinking as I scrolled through my timeline on FaceBook last month. So many of my friends had children that were exceptional. Awards for playing the cello, straight A’s, mastering martial arts and winning the Presidential Award just to name a few.
But, my Munch.
Well my Munch didn’t get any of those awards this year, heck for the last three years if we’re being honest. Does it matter to me? Nope.
Here’s why I’m okay with the fact that my kid is average:
- He lives in his own world. One where he still does a lot of self-play and discovers ways to ask interesting questions about things he sees on YouTube or Disney Jr. He’s inquisitive but has the ability to play well by himself. He asks questions all the time that he knows the answer too which is hilarious, but if he doesn’t know, we look it up. I like that.
- He’s finding his own rhythm. This school year has been one of emotional ups and downs for me as a parent. With knowing that my kid is feeling left out and being bullied to him trying to find his niche, I realized that I need to create more opportunities to just let him be. Being there when he wants and needs, but making sure not to hover.
- He doesn’t care if he moves to the next level or not. He didn’t test at all this school year for a new belt with Tae Kwan Do. He stayed the same level for a year. Was I disappointed? Yes, but I’ve come to realize that I probably need to change the game and do more things that he’s interested in. Figure out what he likes/doesn’t like and try to adjust. Heck, he’s repeating Level 3 swimming for the fifth time. Ugh! Thankfully there are only 6 levels in total, but I’m heeding the advice of Mr. C and giving it a break for now. He knows how to swim, so why am I stressing myself out?
- He likes to chill. Yes, it’s true. My son would rather sit at home and chill and draw Sonic characters for hours on end than go out and run errands, go to the playground or go to a friend’s house. He prefers to sit at home and chill. Yes, I still force him to go outside and learn things (we’re working on how to ride a bike this summer) but I have to respect the fact that he wants/craves downtime.
- He likes soccer and that’s good enough for me. Munch found out that he likes soccer and although he hates to run/workout he likes kicking the ball, meeting team mates and playing in the games. He’s an average player and I’m good with that.
I realized that I put a lot of pressure on myself to make sure that my child is somehow this black prodigy, but why? Why am I trying to create or force something that he’s not ready or willing to take on?
He just wants to exist. Yes, he’s average, but he’s exceptional in being average. He speaks French fluently, can draw artistically and can sing. He wants to learn to play the guitar and we’re going to buy some art supplies this weekend. I guess the key phrase is that “he wants” to do it. I guess in the end that’s all that matters because I want him to be great in his averageness.