I Am Not That Woman

A letter to all men that I’ve dated:

I am no longer interested in dating you. I have a man. It may seem like it’s a no brainer, but I need to remind you. You can’t direct message me. You can’t flirt with me. You can’t date me. You can’t!

See, there is a reason we never worked out. I understand that everything happens for a reason. You weren’t the man for me. I wasn’t the woman for you. It’s the truth. We don’t need to keep trying to fit that square peg in a round hole and call it love. It isn’t. It wasn’t. It was lust.

It took me many years to get to the place where I’ve learned to love and accept the woman that I am. It took me many months of dating to find the man that I was supposed to be with. It takes me hours of therapy a month to learn and understand that I deserve a healthy relationship. Not a one night stand.

Or months of sleeping together, hanging out, going to parties and still saying “we’re just friends”. I’ve grown up. I’ve decided that what I want and need doesn’t matter to you. You are incapable of giving it to me. Or maybe you were just incapable at that time. Either way, our time has passed.

You need to know that I’m not the same woman I was when I met you. I’m different. I’m happy. I’m healthy. I’m in a much better space now. In this space that I’ve created, there isn’t room for you. There’s just room for me and the man that has my heart.

It’s okay though.

You should just leave me alone and allow me the opportunity to continue to grow in this beautiful relationship that I have. I can’t date you. I can’t sext you. I can’t anything with you. Thank you for telling me that you miss me. I’m flattered.

Actually, I’m not.

I don’t go backwards. Our time has passed. I no longer desire to hear words of appreciation or fake sincerity. What I want, you can’t give. But, I am asking that you respect my space or get blocked. The choice is yours.

 

Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links:  Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.

Acceptance

I’ve been fortunate to be accepted into some things that I’ve wanted. College, clubs and organizations, graduate school and my sorority. These were all positive things. I was accepted into a club that not everyone was or could be a part of.

But, I’ve also known what it feels like to not be accepted. I’ve gone on interviews for jobs that I didn’t get. It depressed the hell out of me. I was always the girl that gets the job. How did they not want me? I learned to accept the disappointment that came with someone being more qualified.

Acceptance of the situation.

When the doctors wanted to do a biopsy on my thyroids because they saw something, I accepted that I would have to go under the knife. I accepted that I may have cancer. I prepared myself for God’s will be done. Thankfully, it worked out in my favor, but I accepted it.

This is life. Sometimes things will work out in our favor and other times they won’t. Do you accept that some things were not meant to be? Do you look it at your life and realize that this wasn’t the path you were supposed to take at that time? Do you keep pursuing your goals or do you just give up?

Don’t ever give up on your dreams! Accept that life will throw you curve balls and fast balls and balls that you can catch, but know that you matter. That your fate is something you can control.

If you believe.

Accept that you will win some. Accept that you will lose some. Accept that in the end that if you’ve done all that you can do then you have lived.

Acceptance.

 

This post was inspired by the Daily Post. The word prompt was acceptance

Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links:  Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.

Wisdom Wednesday – 3/22/17

Just thought I would send you some encouragement today. I wanted to share these words that resonated with me this morning in my meditation.

#1:  Never give up – You were meant for greatness…

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#2:  Remember where you come from and that a wise man or woman never stops learning…

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#3.  Choose your circle wisely. There is nothing wrong with cleaning house from those who don’t wish you well…

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#4.  Don’t get caught up worrying about your “haters”. Focus on following your intuition…

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I hope these photos encourage you to keep going through whatever you’re going through and know that the situation you find yourself in is only temporary. We can’t let our obstacles overwhelm and obscure our views of the shore. We have to keep rowing. Perseverance and persistence are the friends to faith. Let’s keep our heads up.

 

 

Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links:  Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.

Motivational Monday Moment – 3/20/2017

It’s the first day of spring. I’m late getting my post out. I needed to be motivated this morning so I’ve struggled with what to write. Please forgive me for the delay. I started thinking about what I could tell you to motivate you this morning. I had nothing.

I didn’t feel motivated. I felt tired and exhausted of having to fight the same battle over and over again. I felt as though my back was up against the wall. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know what to say. I just knew that I wanted peace.

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There are some difficult situations that I have to face in the coming weeks. I will share more as I know more, but I was really feeling overwhelmed. I told Mr. C that I needed him to encourage me this morning. To make me feel better.

He said “You have a job. You have money. You woke up this morning. Your son is healthy. You have a boss that is understanding.” Okay, I get it. Not enough. But, poignant and true. I wasn’t giving thanks. I was feeling the pain of my issue and not giving the praise.

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I talked to another friend about my situation and he told me that God told him that “It’s a blessing to be tested and tried by Him. “ He told me to not dismay and know that God is blessing me regardless of whatever I’m going through. He told me to be encouraged and know that we serve a mighty God.

I know.

I’m human.

I just want peace.

Every time I feel like I get a little peace and quiet, things come along to disturb the natural order of the way I believe my life should work. The peace that I thought I had is always short lived. Things disturb this natural order and I feel overwhelmed. I’m struggling ya’ll.

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I know that what Mr. C said and what my friend said made sense. I’m a Christian and sometimes I feel like I’m failing. I’m failing at trying to keep chaos from interfering in my life. I didn’t ask for this. I just want to ride out the peace for years to come.

I know that I’m not living in reality right now. What’s wrong with wanting peace? Nothing. 51ef3e3fc97a88c221e264f8e788cbf0

But, God.

God spoke to me through music to ease my weary soul. He often speaks to me through music when I’m going through something and I ask for His help. When I pray for peace and I can’t seem to hear it through the noise of me wanting to take control of my own life and do what I want. He did it today.

I was listening to Marsha Ambrosious on Pandora and he played Mary Mary’s gospel song “Yesterday”. I had to close my office door because tears began to roll down my face as they sang “Any problems that I had he’s greater, he’s greater than them all. I decided that I cried my last tears yesterday.” – Mary Mary. God was speaking to me. I was doing too much.

I hear you God. I can’t keep crying about the situation. I gave it to you. I need to trust you to do your will. I need to lean on you and know that you are greater than any problems that I have. So, my Motivational Monday Moment is to trust. Trust God. Trust Him with everything.

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We can’t keep crying over the same situation and the same problems. We need to give our all to God. He is the way maker and we know that all things work according to His will. I trust you God. No more tears. Thy will be done.

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Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links:  Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.

Happy Spring

Today is the first day of Spring! We’ve changed seasons and now it’s time to spring clean: our medicine cabinets, our pantries, our homes, etc. What are you getting rid of this Spring?

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Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links:  Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.

Dating Diary: Treat Em Right

I am always looking for new ways to work on my relationship with Mr. C and just trying to be a good girlfriend. I’ve never been a girlfriend for long and I wasn’t concerned about my exes feelings and we were young  that it didn’t matter. As, I’m now over 40 and constantly learning myself, I’ve learned to focus on communication with Mr. C as a means to strengthen our relationship.

Why? Because I love him. And? I love him more than being vulnerable. I actually hate being vulnerable. I said it. I feel like it opens me up and you can see what I’m really feeling. I hate showing my feelings. Ugh!

But, I do with Mr. C. Even when I try not to, he knows me well enough to tell when something is wrong. He pays attention to me. Especially to my tone. It’s a good and bad thing at times.

That being said I understand the importance of making sure that I’m meeting his needs. I don’t ask all the time, but I think it’s important to find out if there are things that he desires of me that I’m just not paying attention too. Blame it on my short attention span, but he deserves to know that I’m invested and concerned about him as a man, as a father, as a son and as a human being. I’m paying attention.

So, I asked him three questions to do a relationship check-up and find out how I’m doing and give myself a tune-up if need be so that we can be on one accord. My 3 questions were as follows:

  1. What things could I do to strengthen our communication?
  2. Do you think I’m open to your ideas and/or suggestions?
  3. Do you believe that I value and respect our time together? Do I put you first?

His responses were:

  1. When we make plans/meeting each other lets make sure we communicate that we are on the same pages, from beginning to end.
  2. I believe you are but sometimes my ideas are shot down.  i.e.  meeting for breakfast…its not about us eating just sitting and talking..connecting before you go to work.
  3. You do except for when you get that social media buzz.  but it doesn’t bother me because I get it…I completely understand when there’s a need to check our devices.

Yeah, he responded! However, I’m not surprised. He’s a great guy who is open to me reaching out and soliciting input at any moment. That being said it looks like I have work to do. I agree with #1 and I realized that I do #2 and #3 so I have to check myself and make sure that I’m being present in the moment and not shooting down my man’s ideas. I can be a negative Nancy and I need to work on that. Also, I need to make sure that he has my undivided attention and turn my head away from my phone.

Now, Mr. C wanted me to answer the same questions about him. Here’s how I responded:

  1. You could confirm date/time and locations anytime we are meeting. Make sure that we are on the same page from beginning to end. You could also talk to me more. Let me know more of what you think about things that I say or do.
  2. I don’t understand when I mention something that you don’t really give a yes or no response right at that moment. I feel like I’m being blown off in some ways so then I don’t want to suggest things. I know it’s not true, but I need you to either 1. answer immediately or 2. write it down and follow-up with me timely. By not following up it makes me feel like you don’t care about it.
  3. Yes, I believe that you value our time together and yes I believe that you try to put me first.

Yep, time for us to get to work!

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Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links:  Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.