All men that date me have to know that their name may end up in a pop song. – Kesha
“It must be hard dating you”. That’s what one of my girlfriends said to me a couple of weeks ago. Over happy hour she said, “I can’t imagine how a man feels. Dating you must be hard.” I asked “Why?” She said, “Because you’re very open and transparent on your blog and I wonder if he has to feel like he is going to end up on your blog someday.” I laughed and said, “Yeah, I will probably write about it, but many men don’t read my blog so I guess dating me isn’t hard.”
But, I thought about it. I mean should I be concerned that the men that I date don’t read my blog? Nope. I realized that I can’t force someone to read my blog unless they want too. Heck, my own family doesn’t read it. So, I won’t be deterred. However, one man does.
He’s the one that I loosely based the short story of Faith and Teddy after. He reads it ALL THE TIME. Even when I write in code about him, he knows it’s about him. He makes me laugh because he’ll say, “It’s cool that you write about me. It means that I’m your inspiration.”
Or my headache.
I like that he reads my stuff, which is why he’s still around. He questions me, supports me and inspires me. I like that. However, I guess I have to wonder how serious could I truly get about a man who doesn’t take the time to read my stuff?
One of my favorite movies, Brown Sugar, talks about two best friends and their relationship struggles and the female lead, Sanna Lathan, loved the fact that her best friend read her writing faithfully. She realized that having a man who was supportive of her career goals was important. So, the question I have is how important is it that a man support your passions? Does it matter in the dating and just getting to know each other stage or it’s a requirement to get to the next level?
In my opinion…Yes, it matters that you support my passions and dreams in order to get to the next level. This is a requirement to be with me. You have to also understand that I may write about our relationship and you need to be cool with that. I want someone who is confident in being in a relationship with me. I want them to see that I am open and I am transparent with my readers and I don’t believe in censorship. He and/or our situation may end up as a post. It’s part of the process. But, I also want him to know that it is part of my growing. I write-through it all; joy, pain and difficult times. It helps me and it helps others. I want a man who sees that.