I told you last month that I’m putting myself back out there and dating again. It’s been almost a year since Mr. C and I broke up and I haven’t dated since 2015. Whew! This dating thing is not for the faint of heart. It seems to be a confusing circle of foolishness with specks of sanity that disappear as soon as the phone numbers are exchanged.
Can I just tell you that I’m tired? Already. If you are in a happy, healthy and functioning relationship with MINOR problems – don’t end your relationship. Work on it and stay together. The grass is definitely not greener out here. Some days it is downright brown as hell and with pieces of black scorch marks.
The men that I mentioned that had peaked my interest in my post: Trust the Process have all been eliminated. I can’t tell you why. Okay, yes I can so I will say this:
- Mr. T – does not have time. Time to get to know me. Time to date. He started slacking off with the calls and I did too. He also kept making comments about how he could be in DC and sleeping on my couch. Umm, nope. Ya’ll may not know this but I don’t allow any man that I’m not in a relationship to ever step foot in my house as that is the place where my Munch lays his head. Only a boyfriend would get that privilege. But, we didn’t get there. It was the lack of communication that killed it. He then said that I want you to send me messages so that I can hear them when I get off work. I kindly replied that I could do that but communication is a two way street so I needed him to do more. We both stopped trying. It is part of the process.
- Mr. D – he’s the one that I gave a second chance too when he showed me the crack in his self-esteem. Things were going well. He was out of town on business for about a week and a half. We conversed the Wednesday night before he flew back home. He was at the airport. I told him to have a safe flight and we’d talk tomorrow. The next morning I woke up sick as a dog and went to urgent care and got some medications. I realized that I didn’t know if he’d made it safely home so I sent him a good morning text and asked had he arrived safely. He said he had and sent emojis. Ugh, emojis are weird to me. So, I slept all day Thursday, went to work sick on Friday and came home with Munch and went to bed early Friday night. When I awoke on Saturday he had called 3 times Friday night. He called 10:25 pm; 10:35 pm and 11:25 pm. I knew it must have been an emergency because what man would ever call that late and 3 times. I immediately called him and he sent me to voicemail. I didn’t think anything of it. I assumed he was still dealing with his emergency until he sent me a text that said: I’m starting to think you’re full of shit. I’m done. Lose my number. What? You know what I did…I obliged and lost his number because he obviously lost his mind.
- Mr. R – we just sort of fell off. It was a conversation that we had prior to our second date (I told you that I can tell before the 3rd date whether or not we can build a friendship). I was telling him a situation that brought me clarity and involved another man and he cut me off stating he doesn’t want to hear about another man. Okay. I paused. We got off the phone and he called me back and apologized and said that he doesn’t want to hear about another man because he’s trying to get to know me. Uh huh. He apologized for his tone and I told him I don’t like censorship and that any man that chooses to silence me shouldn’t. He said he wasn’t. We went out one other time and it was forced. We stopped communicating after that.
To summarize, the three that I was dealing with last month have fallen off the radar. They are no longer a possibility. LOL. If that makes sense. I’m still dating. I need a hobby. I’ve met some decent human beings but I’m not at the point where I think anyone is an option to even be a friend yet. We still got to work on some things.
I’m just living and enjoying life. I’m hanging out with friends and just creating memories for 2019. I don’t expect that love will just fall in my lap but I’m actively allowing myself to be open should it be a possibility.
I’m going to say it again…the dating game is not for the faint of heart. It requires strength, flexibility and a sense of humor. But, here’s to hoping.