Yesterday when scrolling through Facebook I see this great post that was shared to a group that I’m in:
The post angered a lot of people. They felt judged. I get it. But, should you feel that way? Yelling at your child early in the morning starts them off on the wrong foot. We’ve got to do better. Speak in normal tones to them. If you set them on edge first thing in the morning, how do you think the rest of their day will go?
I saw this video below a couple of years ago and it really solidified in my mind that I was doing right by Munch.
There were many opportunities to start the child off on the right path and each adult that he encountered was determined to make his day suck. Yep, it was the adults fault. You are the ones that set the tone for how their day should be. Can they have bad days if you do everything right? Yes, absolutely, but how they start their day matters. Just like eating a healthy breakfast in the morning is best, it is also imperative that we put our children in a mindset of success and peace.
I commented on the Facebook post in my group with this…
This mother commented that compared to you I must be doing something wrong. I laughed and said “No, we do our best. I only have one. I chose to do my best and pour the very best of what I have in raising him. It’s important that I get up each morning and fix him a hot breakfast. That I make sure he is presentable and in a positive mood each day. It’s my job as his parent. I wasn’t raised in the manner I’m choose to raising my son. Not a bad thing. I chose to raise him differently.” I’m not in competition with other parents. I am just choosing to do what I believe is best for Munch. Some days are good. Some days are a struggle. But that’s to be expected, right?
The other day Munch was taking his sweet time eating breakfast (38 minutes) and I was going to be late getting him to Before Care. I calmly called downstairs and asked him was he finished eating? He said he wasn’t. I then told him that I needed him to come upstairs in 7 minutes because we were late. We had to go. He started to talk about how he wasn’t finished. He still had food to eat. I explained that he was being distracted by watching his Ipad and not eating his breakfast. He complained that he was not. He then wanted to argue with me. I calmly replied “This was not a choice. I asked you to follow my instructions because you need to finish so we can get dressed and leave.” He did as instructed and we finished getting dressed and we left.
When I chose to practice positive parenting I knew that there would be days that would be overwhelmingly frustrating, but I’m sticking with it. I’m choosing to teach him positive behaviors and not to mess up his day with my own frustrations. Because that is what it is…my frustrations. I need to learn to control me.
I’m different. I do things differently with him. I trust that he will be grateful for the lessons that I’m teaching him and understand that I only wish him peace knowing that it starts with me.
Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links: Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.
A Thomas Point of View 
You are modeling behavior for him that will carry him through life. Well done, you! I always tried to send my daughter off on a positive note. Yes, sometimes I yelled. But, like you, I had only the one, and I took being a parent extremely seriously. My own childhood showed me what NOT to do. It does take vigilance, but my Punkin was/is worth it. 🙂
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Yes, they are so worth it.
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I totally agree with you. I love the idea of positive parenting x
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Yep, I am constantly checking myself because it is still new to me.
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#issamovementsis I honestly didn’t know that “positive parenting” was a thing until started reading your blog. I knew about authoritative vs authoritarian parenting, which can be like a rubix cube of confusion. I commend you on what you’re doing with Munch, as I am doing the same with Batman. It works, keep at it!!!
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Thank you. I’m heading over to your blog.
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Everyone has their own way of parenting and sometimes we are not following the way we were raised, nor do we do as outsiders expect us to do. Instead, we raise our children as we see fit.
I yell at my children when I feel the need to. However, I have learned that yelling in public was not something that I wanted to teach my children. So if I can bare it, I usually wait until we are in the comfort of our own home. I didn’t care about the attention or thoughts of others when I did yell in public. For most times it was a reaction to something that required immediate attention.
Nowadays, when I see a parent yelling at their child in public, I shake my head and I say to myself “I remember those days.”
With the way that the world is going today from school shootings to etc. I say if a yell will help save lives in the future, go for it.
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I completely agree with what she said in her post though!! she’s absolutely right!
http://personalgrowthsuccessblog.com/2018/05/30/to-the-mom-who-feels-discouraged
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I use to be that mother that yelled all the time. I felt that it made them really “hear” what I was saying. Honestly I really did not get the message I was sending them off to school with until I got into a relationship and he told me to get my act together. After a while of I am right” scenarios I had to look at myself in the mirror and reevaluate. I stopped procrastinating and every Sunday I started to have them pick out there clothes while I ironed them for the entire school week. I even did hairstyles that would last for the school week. That helped tremendously with time management and I saw my self yelling less and less. This was a great read. I am still managing positive energy in the house. I will admit it is hard from time to time not to yell but not I just take a deep breath (literally lol) and discuss with them different ways to handle the situation they are in at the moment. Thank you for the read.
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Loved this. Self reflection is always good. Thanks for sharing.
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I love that you’re bringing this idea that parenting is not only about “keeping your kids in check” but also about checking yourself! I admire your level of self awareness and your willingness to do what you know will be best for Munch now as well as later 👏🏼👏🏼 way to go Mama!
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Thanks so much
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