I’m back! My surgery went well and I’ve returned to work today. I was losing my dang mind. But, I have to tell you that laparoscopic surgery is the best. Shorter recovery time and I just feel better than any of my prior surgeries.
I still can’t lift over 20 pounds and work out of 6 weeks, but I’m moving around and have been medication free for about four days. That’s good news! So many things have happened over the last few weeks that put my mind on the track that I need to write about them. So, look out for some things to come.
I am so excited because I got my hard print copy of my work in KE Garland’s new book “Daddy”. You can find it on Amazon by clicking the link or you can purchase the paper back copy of the book by clicking the picture of the book to the right of my page. I’m reading it and will have my write up next week about the book.
I am excited to be among the living and I’m feeling so much better. I’ve missed each and every one of you and I can’t wait to catch-up on your posts. Please bear with me.
“Two people can only keep a secret if one of them is dead.”
Out of all the crazy stuff my Dominican abuela (I mean, grandmother) used to say, that was the wisest and truest thing to ever come out of her big uncensored mouth.
You see, the secret I’ve been keeping has been eating away at me. And with each passing day, the story keeps bubbling up inside of me, trying to escape.
I’ve never told anyone about what happened, at least not all of it.
But I have to get this weight off of my chest and the only way I can do it is by writing it down. If I was really smart, I wouldn’t write it down at all, especially online where people could find it. But I need to tell my story and figure out how I ended up here in the first place.
This blog is really meant for me and my eyes only. I mean, who would even care about my incoherent ramblings?
But just in case someone does stumble across this blog (and if you are reading this, I mean YOU), please remember that I’m not a bad person. I had to take Abuela’s words to heart and I did what needed to be done to save myself.
Truth be told, a little part of me hopes that you do find this blog. I mean, maybe you’ll help me piece this all together and help me see where I went wrong, though I kind of already know.
And of course, I’m writing this anonymously so I won’t tell you my real name. But you can call me “Cara”, short for “Caramel”. That was Abuela’s nickname for me because she loved the color of my skin. She also said that I was like burnt sugar with a bitter aftertaste. Back then, I never knew what she meant by that and the only time I had the nerve to ask, she had simply shrugged her shoulders and said:
“Mas sabe el diablo por viejo que por diablo“.
Yes, the devil knows more from experience than from being the devil. Maybe Abuela saw something in me back then that I only discovered later and that I’m reconciling with now…who knows.
But I’m getting off topic. Maybe I’ll write about that later.
Right now, I need to start at the beginning and tell you how I met my abuser Dex..
This guest post by Marquessa Matthews. It is a repost from her A to Z Challenge and you must read all the posts in this challenge. She is an incredible writer that I’m praying gets to publishing a collection of her short stories soon. Please check out her blog at https://marquessamatthews.com/
I recently hit 2,500 WordPress followers. I humbly thank each and every one of you for following me. It has been an amazing journey and I am continuing to grow and learn with each passing month.
I’ve changed the layout of my blog and I’m trying some new things this year. Tell me what you think. I’m also going to start promoting the works of others. Bear with me as I will be out of commission for the next couple of weeks.
But, more importantly, I want to say that I am thankful for each and every one of you. You continue to read and engage me in my posts and I’m genuinely thankful for the interaction. You’ve become family. Here’s to continued growth for all of us.
Help! One of my goals for 2018 was to move to a self-hosted platform and I’m struggling to make a decision. For those of you that may be new to blogging, moving to a self-hosted platform will allow me more control over my blog with regards to customizing functions and style. It’s daunting as heck, but oh so worth it.
I know this. I’ve watched my blog grow from about 100 followers in 2014 when I first started to get back into blogging to 700 in late 2016 and now I’m almost at 2,500 WordPress subscribers. There has been growth.
In that time, I’ve contributed to two books being published and many posts. I’m working on my craft and working on turning my passion into profit. To that end, I want to be able to have more control on my blog and website. It’s time.
But, I’m overwhelmed by it all. I know that I can’t be alone. Were you overwhelmed when you started researching the move to a self-hosted platform? How did you make the choice to move? Which platform did you select? Was it hard to implement? What was the cost? I’m looking at cost, ease of use and unmetered storage.
It’s just me. Doing it on my own, but I’m hoping to have an interactive blog/website running by year end. Did you get overwhelmed by doing it yourself? What are some of the things/thoughts that I should be thinking about?
I really need your help. All advice is greatly appreciated.
I’ve decided to participate in the A to Z Challenge for the month of April. This is the first time that I’ve done the challenge and I’m excited. I will try to limit my posts to once a day to coincide with the challenge so that you are not bombarded. But, please bear with me.
The challenge will run through the month of April. Check out how you can sign-up to participate and be on the lookout for my theme reveal next week.
The A to Z challenge is scheduled to run through the month of April. You can sign-up now through April 1st here: AtoZ Challenge
Please don’t think I’m creepy but I can’t help it.
She moved in last week and I have been watching her almost every single morning. It’s not like I go out of my way to do it. Her bedroom window and balcony is directly in line with my French doors and even though there is quite a distance between the two houses, I still have a good view from the kitchen island as I drink my coffee.
She has wrecked my morning routine. After having breakfast with Nate and then sending him off to get ready for the day with niñera Alma, I used to spend that time meditating. But instead, I am observing her, wondering where she comes from and for how long she will stay at the Wilson’s rental home. I am intrigued and not just because she is cute. And curvy in all the right places. There is just something different about her.
In the morning, her black curls suffer from a serious case of bedhead and she glides around barefoot in some kind of over-sized T-shirt, starting her day with a large mug of coffee on her balcony and looking out into the distance until it is empty. What she doesn’t realize is that we are having coffee together.
When she is through with her coffee, she disappears for a while and reappears with a towel wrapped around her wet hair, a bathrobe hugging her body. She turns on some music but never loud enough for me to decipher what is actually playing. A smile on her face, I can see her dancing and twirling, from her bedroom to the balcony and back. I chuckle as she brushes her teeth and suddenly stops to use her toothbrush as a microphone mid-balcony. She never glances around to see if anyone is watching her and even at the odd occasion when joggers pass by at that early hour, she doesn’t miss a beat. She waves, they wave back and she continues dancing.
She doesn’t seem to have a care in the world. And just watching her somehow makes me happy. I am more than intrigued and haven’t felt that way for a long time, probably since being with Nate’s mother.
I know that she isn’t a regular tourist or vacationer. Dressed quite chic and her wild curls tamed into a tight bun, she would disappear into the back of a black town car at 8am and resurface around 4pm.
Where is she going with nothing more than a fashionable purse everyday?
Since I have been spending full days in the studio on the east side of the house, I see the same town car pull up to the main community gate and so that’s how I know she gets back around 4pm...It’s not like I am some creepy dude with no life next door. But that’s what you were thinking, right?
From the heavenly scents coming from the Wilson’s house around 5pm everyday, I know that she is a good cook. Concoctions that required buttery fried onions, freshly diced tomatoes, pungent herbs…Definitely a woman who can handle herself in a kitchen and likes real food. And from the healthy curves she has in all the right places (I said that before, didn’t I?), I can tell that she appreciates a good meal. She isn’t one of those I-will-just-have-a-salad kind of girls, she is a meat and potatoes/rice and beans type of woman. A woman after my own heart.
I noticed a few days ago that she takes walks on the beach at sunset, adorned in workout clothes and ear plugged into her cell phone tight within her grasp.
I need to meet her and somehow invite her over for Christmas dinner with us.
And that’s when I decide to take Nate for a walk before his bedtime to accidentally on purpose bump into her.
I have a lot of thoughts. Conversations occur. People ask for advice. People share things about their lives. I overthink the conversation, advice, or experience, and voila! A thought occurs. So, I jot it down in my notes section in hopes of writing about it on a future date. I have 221 notes on my phone. I figured the future is now lol. Here’s my first one:
I’ve listened to how my male friends talk about women and how they interact with them. I also listen to and observe how women interact with men. Sometimes it’s different.
Men don’t treat every woman like she’s their future wife. They don’t treat every relationship like there’s an impending wedding. Men seem to know which women are so-called “wife material” and which ones are not ready to commit. Consequently, they seem to treat each “type” of woman accordingly. Now, I’m not saying this…
Hello my faithful and wonderful readers. I am taking a blogging break from December 26 through January 1, 2018 to spend time with my Munch. If you would like to guest host on my blog during this time, let me know and I would love to host you.
Some housekeeping items for hosting on my site:
Read through my site. I discuss everything about life, love, dating, parenting and relationships and anything in between. Keep with my genre topics.
Make it fun and relateable. Let readers want to know more about you and to follow you.
Respond to any comments a reader leaves on my page. This is a must for me. Let them know that you appreciate their response on your post and answer any questions.
Keep the swearing to a minimum. I love a good curse word two, but your post shouldn’t be all about your invention of new curse words.
Posts should be between 250-800 words or less
Create a catchy title
Reblog and share on your site and social media handles
That’s about it. I will host seven bloggers and just let me know on this post if you are interested in being a guest blogger. Thank you in advance.
I’ve been a little busy. I forgot to tell you that I have reached over 2,000 WordPress followers. As of today, I’m at 2,053.
I’m truly honored at the fact that you chose to follow me. I’m overwhelmed with gratitude. I value each and every one of you.
This year has been one for the books. There were many ups and downs, but it has been nothing short of amazing. Who would have thought it was less than a year ago that was I writing my 1,000 Followers! post.
I’ve increased my followers 100% in less than a year. Wow! I’m so thankful that you decided to follow this divorced mama with a passion for children, life and love. Hopefully, you’ve checked out my about me page and learned Who Am I?
If not, please do. But, I am going to follow suit from one of my other bloggers, Rosie from Rosie Culture who asked fellow readers to feel free to ask questions and respond. I’m going to do the same. Please feel free to ask questions in the comments and I will respond in a post next week to all your questions.