My heart aches.
My mind is racing.
My patience is low.
I don’t want to fight no more.
Fighting is exhausting.
Fighting is distracting.
I can’t be distracted.
No time for games.
No time for distractions.
No time for the fake ones.
This hell I find myself in is one I chose.
The moment I said yes.
I chose it.
I have to remember it.
But, I have to remember that I can change my mind.
To recognize my choices and accept my fate.
To move beyond the bullshit and give my all
To the people that matter.
To the situations that require my attention.
To the friends that love without judgement.
To the family that supports without knowledge.
To the man who promises me a healthy love.
To the job that pays my salary.
To the readers who support my talent.
To the charitable organizations that benefit from my service.
To those that inspire.
To those that encourage.
To those that believe.
Believe in me.
Even when I don’t believe in myself.
I will close my eyes tonight.
No more tears.
With praise on my tongue
I will cry out…
Can you hear me Lord?
Can you hear the pain in my heart?
Can you see the destruction of those that seek to hurt me?
Can you see that I am your faithful servant Lord?
And I will give it to Him.
I will leave it on the altar.
I will say…
I trust you Lord.
I know that you’re watching.