Motivational Monday Moment – 02.26.18

It’s the last Monday in February. Today’s Motivational Monday Moment is from the movie Kingdom Come which was horrible. I really couldn’t stand this movie. I think it had too much going on and it never seemed realistic. But, the music was good in the movie. The song that I chose was God’s Got It All In Control. This song reminds me that even when I can’t see God, he’s still working it out in my favor.

How awesome is that? He knows and sees all that is happening around us and He’s still got it under control. That’s reason to praise His name.

A sample of the lyrics to the song are:

If you can just hold on my brother
Just be strong my sister, God, oh God
God’s got your problem all in control
He’s working it out, it’s all in control

So just hold on, God will be there
In the midst of your storm
So dry your eyes
God’s got your problem all in control

He’s working it out, He’s working it out
He’s working it out, it’s all in control

I’ve been there. I’ve been wracked with pain thinking that no one can see me out this storm that I find myself in. I’m struggling to stay afloat and the winds keep bashing and trying to break me, but God. God is still in control. He’s got it all in control.

We need to remember that our faith is being tested and we need to dry our eyes and give it to God. He’s working it out on our behalf. He’s going to bring us through it, we just need to believe that we’ll get through it.

So, my Motivational Monday is about remembering that God’s got it all in control. You need to hand him the wheel of your life and trust that He will guide you to safety. Keep your eyes and heart turned to Him.

Be blessed loves!

Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links: Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.

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I Hate You So Much Right Now

Remember that great song by Kelis – Caught Out There? Aww, it was a great song to show the rage of women after being lied on or cheated on by their significant others. It was an anthem for women. You don’t have to take it. She screamed. She destroyed stuff. She showed her emotions. Haven’t we all been there before?

But, that’s not what this post is about. LOL. It isn’t about hate. It is about you. Choosing you. Choosing to forgive and choosing to create your life with boundaries.

See, a few weeks ago a friend and I were having a conversation about forgiveness. He said to me that if I forgive someone then I should be willing to share my personal space with them. I laughed. I explained that forgiveness is for self and not for the other person.

If someone commits an egregious act towards you or does something that just doesn’t sit well in your spirit, you have the right to protect yourself. Your first obligation is to you. It is and will always be. Think about when you fly and they tell you that if you are flying with children and the oxygen masks deploy you should put your own mask on first and then secure the child’s. You’re no help to anyone if you don’t take care of yourself.

Some of you may be asking, what are personal boundaries? I searched and found the perfect definition from Z. Hereford in the article Healthy Personal Boundaries and How to Establish Them

“Personal boundaries are the physical, emotional and mental limits we establish to protect ourselves from being manipulated, used, or violated by others. They allow us to separate who we are, and what we think and feel, from the thoughts and feelings of others. Their presence helps us express ourselves as the unique individuals we are, while we acknowledge the same in others.”

Sounds simple right? It is. I know that you may think that it is hard to really do, but trust me when you choose yourself first that it really makes it easy to not allow your personal boundaries to be crossed. Setting boundaries allows you to no longer be a victim. You become the leader of your own life. You become responsible for your own happiness.

I have to be honest. Setting personal boundaries was not a lesson that I learned early on. I learned to establish boundaries at 41. Can you believe it? I don’t want you to wait. I don’t want Munch to wait. You have to choose you.

I started to choose me first. I started to realize that I would not allow someone else’s feelings or thoughts about me impact my life. I choose to re-evaluate my life and relationships to remove toxic people. I chose to live my life on my own terms without giving a care as to who felt otherwise or didn’t like it.

I chose me.

It can seem overwhelming when you create boundaries and try to enforce them, but you need to remember that it is part of your personal responsibility. To yourself. No one can make you happy but YOU. So, the power lies within.

You have to take responsibility for how people treat you. You have to know that if you continue to allow disrespect and you don’t want it then it really is your fault. Stop letting people tell you that you have to have a relationship with someone that mistreats you because they are a relative or you are connected through children. You don’t. You just live your life choosing you first.

Forgiveness for me honestly means that I don’t dwell on the negativity, pain and hurt you caused. It means that I remove you from my life with little to no contact. I don’t allow you the opportunity to hear my voice or be in my presence. I set the tone. I set the rules.

Trust me when I tell you that this is the most freeing way to live. I actually dated men that I allowed to walk all over my boundaries and then justified their behavior and rezoned my boundaries. Yep, I was crazy. Why would I ever allow someone that kind of power in my life?

Because I subscribed to the belief that I had to be this ever forgiving doormat for others to walk on. I believed that otherwise people would think I wasn’t nice. I was trying to live up to an image others expected. Now…I don’t.

I live for me. My life. My choices. I forgive. I keep my boundaries firm. I choose me. You need to do the same.

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Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links: Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.

Motivational Monday Moment – 02.19.18

Today’s Motivational Monday Moment comes from the movie Black Nativity starring Forest Whitaker, Angela Bassett, Jacob Lattimore and Jennifer Hudson. The song that I chose from that movie was “Be Grateful”. This song was originally sung by Walter Hawkins and released in 1978. The original is magnificent, but this is a great rendition.

This is one of my favorite gospel songs. It reminds me to be grateful in all circumstances. Even when you are going through hell you should be grateful because God didn’t promise only sunshine. Every now and then we will get rain.

Some of the lyrics to the song are:

God desires to feel your longings
Every pain that you feel, he feels them
Just like you
But he can’t afford to let you feel only good (only good)
Then you can appreciate the good time

Be grateful(2x’s)
Cause there’s someone else who’s worse off than you
Be grateful
Cause that someone else who’d love to be in your shoes

Great huh? It reminds you that there is always someone off worse than you. Isn’t that what life is about? Being grateful.

If you only knew what I was going through, you would wonder how I have such a positive attitude. Let me tell you how and why? God. That’s it. Simply because I trust in the Master’s plan to see me out of each and every situation.

It’s Lenten season and while there are many people giving up things during this time, I’m asking you to not give up on God. See, we all get busy and we forget to thank and just pray to God every day. We forgot that His will never ends but we push him to the side.

We worry. We struggle to get through our trials and tribulations. We talk to our friends and family. We suffer in silence. Tears running down our face. We forget to give it to Him. Don’t give up on God, love. Be grateful that you have that relationship and count it all good.

So, my Motivational Monday Moment is about reminding you to be grateful no matter the circumstance. Know that trouble don’t last always. He’s working it out on your behalf. Remember that and be blessed.

Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links: Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.

Parenting: Discipline Part II

I told you in last week’s post entitled Parenting: Discipline Part I how Munch had disrespected his teacher and the level of disrespect had me questioning who was this little boy. I know that many of you experienced parents are probably laughing at me right now, but I genuinely had no idea who this young man was. But, I had to discipline him because he had to understand the lesson.

The lesson that I was trying to teach is about learning when to speak. It’s hard. We tend to speak first and think later. I get it. But, that’s a lesson you learn over time and it was something that I had to teach now. I explained to him that the Bible is full of lessons about holding your tongue and how you can make things worse. We read James 3:5 which states:

James 3:5 New Revised Standard Version (NRSV)

5 So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great exploits.
How great a forest is set ablaze by a small fire!

We didn’t stop there. We read Psalm 19:14 which states:

Psalm 19:14 King James Version (KJV)

14 Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my strength, and my redeemer.

I explained to Munch that it’s not easy to bridle your tongue in the face of things you may consider unjust, but you have too. We all do. I tried to tell him that we will all fall short but that he needed to learn self-control and it won’t happen overnight. You just have to keep at it.

There was a lesson in there for me. We all need to learn how to bridle our tongues. He didn’t get TV or electronic privileges and no dessert. He was unhappy, but he understood that there was a consequence to the action. We talked, we read and we went to the library. We spent the weekend redirecting negative thoughts and bridling our tongues.

This parenting journey is rough.

taming_the_tongue

Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links: Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.

The Sins of My Father

I have a confession. I’ve struggled with forgiveness for so long. I told ya’ll about what my therapist said about how I gave my dad grace and not forgiveness. So, here I am feeling somewhat guilty because it has been 3 weeks since my dad called me. He called me on my birthday.

The first time in 34 years. Do you know how disappointed I used to be each and every year? But, God. Each year got easier. I realized that it just didn’t matter to him.

Until 2018. I guess it did matter. He called and left a message saying Happy Birthday. 

I haven’t returned his call. I made up excuses. I had some real stuff going on and real health issues that took priority. But, I haven’t called him back. Why?

I honestly don’t know. I think I am just struggling with my feelings for him. So, I’ve been trying to catch up on some blog posts. Forgive me for my delays. Muddling through emails, throwing myself back in work and then I read two posts about forgiveness.  I stopped.

One was by Maya Moore entitled Football & Forgiveness  and the other by Chris Weatherly entitled What I Wish Everyone Understood About Forgiveness. Two posts in less than 30 minutes about forgiveness? What was going on?

It was as though God was speaking to me. Talking to me. Telling me to push forward and understand where I’m at and decide where I want to be. To talk to him and to let him know. The truth.

I declined to do so. Me and God don’t always see eye to eye, but I know that in the end His word is forevermore, no matter how stubborn I am. So, I pushed his voice to the side and kept it moving. Until Chris Weatherly posted this:

via What I Wish Everyone Understood about Forgiveness

I couldn’t hide anymore. I couldn’t ignore. God was trying to tell me something.

Please read these posts about forgiveness. It will truly encourage you. Are you struggling like me?

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Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links: Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.

Day 23: Today – Thanksgiving

I’m thankful for today. I’m thankful that it is Thanksgiving and that I can be with my family today. Although Munch will be out of town with his dad, he will be there in spirit. I am thankful for being able to smell the home cooked meals and tasting all my mother’s cooking. In a weird twist of fate, she will be home this year and she’s cooking so I’m thankful for that.

I’m thankful that I survived 23 days of telling you what I’m thankful for. I’m thankful that I got to share a piece of me with each of you. I’m thankful for all my followers and I’m thankful for each and every reader of my blog. Truly.

I want you to know that this day is about sharing with our family and friends and being thankful for all that we have. Even if your half is less than someone else, be thankful. Gratitude is a must. Be grateful.

Happy Thanksgiving to you all!

 

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Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links: Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.

Day 14: Lessons Learned

I am human. I will make mistakes. We all will. But, I’m thankful for the lessons learned. In all that I do, I try to see what the lesson is that I was supposed to learn. Many times I discover it and I’m thankful for it.

That’s what life is about. Learning lessons. Learning in spite of your trials and tribulations. Learning through your pain. It’s hard. I know. I’ve been there.

But, there is always a lesson and it will get better. No matter what you are going through there is a light at the end of the tunnel. You may not be able to see it but it is there. When you get to the end, make sure you share your story because someone else may benefit from your story of triumph.

Be a blessing to others and learn the lesson that you were supposed to learn. It’s day 14 and I’m thankful for lessons learned in my #23daysofthankfulness.

lessons-learned-chalkboard

 

Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links: Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.