You Have The Power

I wanted to share a #WednesdayWisdom message with you. My message is simply:

You Have The Power

You have the power to determine the path that your life will take. You have the power to engage in foolishness and you have the power to disengage from it as well. A lot of times we feel helpless in the sense that we feel we must do what society believes we should do and what we truly want to do. Do you boo.

You have the power to decide what the path is that you want to take. No one else can or should decide it for you. Don’t let people tell you that you have to do something you just don’t want to do. Let me give you some examples.

Example 1: I’m a firm believer in not wasting my time. Time is something I can never get back. I don’t like wasting my time. Time is more valuable to me than money. You can always earn back money, but you can’t get time once it is wasted. One of the things that I do to make sure that I don’t waste time is to create a mental check list of what things are working for me and what things aren’t. I then decide whether or not I will continue to engage in those things that aren’t yielding results or move on. The result: I’ve moved on a lot in the last few years.

Example 2: Not responding. I used to believe that everything required a response. If you said something out of your mouth to me sideways, I had to respond. If you wrote me an email with some BS, I had to respond. If you said something about me behind my back, I had to respond. You see the issue right? I was always responding. Feeling the need to defend myself, character or actions. Nope, not anymore. With age comes wisdom.  The result: I don’t respond. My ignore game is strong.

Example 3: You should be nice to people that have wronged you. Nope! Not at all. Wait one minute. Why would you be nice to someone who mistreats you? Who told you that you should keep killing them with kindness? Probably your nice relatives right? Grandma, mom or Aunt Susie Mae? I don’t subscribe to this philosophy anymore. It has negative consequences for you. Your health matters. You matter. If someone is treating you like crap, why would you keep being nice to them, being the bigger person, extending an olive branch or even speaking to them? I’m not suggesting be mean. On the contrary. I’m speaking about protecting you and putting your needs first. The result: Like Cardi B sings in her new song Bodak Yellow: “If I see you and I don’t speak – That means I don’t f*ck with you” The result: I no longer feel obligated to be nice to those that have hurt me. I don’t speak. I don’t engage. I speak when I need and/or want too.

I’m all about encouraging you to live the best possible life. You can’t live that life if you are falling victim to societal norms and expectations about how you should behave when people mistreat you. You have to choose you. You have to take back the power. Turn the other cheek and keep it moving. Don’t waste your time, your response or your voice. Choose you.

Stay strong loves!

 

Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links: Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.

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Motivational Monday Moment – 9.18.17

I am exhausted. Mentally and physically. It is sometimes overwhelming just trying to get it all done. Last week was one of those weeks that required so much and gave so little in return. Have you ever had that? 

Whew! I was tired. I was running on empty by Sunday and I allowed myself and my body the opportunity to rest and gather my thoughts. I didn’t know what I wanted to talk about. I felt overwhelmed and I felt like I was just existing. 

What words could I use to encourage you this Monday? How could I make you see that you must keep going on when I felt so tired to even lace up my shoes? How could I tell you that it is not whether you lose or win, but you must keep moving. Moving forward no matter how tired you are.

Then I saw this quote by Maya Angelou: 

We may encounter many defeats but we must not be defeated.

I realized that was my message. In those 11 words above I knew what I needed to tell you. I needed to encourage you and tell you that no matter how tired you are or how many times you’ve been knocked down that you have to get back up. You must get back up. We must not be defeated.

I know that life sometimes gets hard and it feels that you are being pulled in a million directions. You feel overwhelmed and you don’t know how you can keep going on. You haven’t found a job, you are in a horrible court battle or you lost a close friend or family member and you just want to lay there. 

But, this situation love that you find yourself in is temporary. You will encounter the defeats, but you must not be defeated. You need to get up and get out into the world and fight back. Fight for your piece of the pie. 

Will it be easy? Nope. Will it be worth it in the end? Yes. 

It was Theodore Roosevelt who said:

Nothing in the world is worth having or worth doing unless it means effort, pain, difficulty… I have never in my life envied a human being who led an easy life. I have envied a great many people who led difficult lives and led them well.

Don’t envy those that seem to have it easy. You will go through pain and difficulty, but it it will strengthen and encourage you. You will get through this week and any situations that you may be going through. The race is still going on. Just join in.

 

Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links: Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.

Motivational Monday Moment – 08.07.17

Happy Monday Everyone!

Sorry for the delay in posting the Motivational Monday Moment. I didn’t have it scheduled for today and I didn’t know what to talk about. It’s a rainy Monday morning and Munch is with me this week. This means that I will be working late because I have to take him to camp in the mornings and my mom will pick him up from camp in the afternoon.

I had no clue how to motivate you today, but it hit me. When I was in the car driving being annoyed at the rain, feeling uncertain about Munch’s angst at going to a new camp, I realized I was struggling. It came to me that I would talk to you about attitude.

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See, I was upset that it was raining and I hate driving in the rain. Mainly because others can’t drive. I hate that I’m exhausted because I had a combined total of maybe 12 hours of sleep this weekend and my Munch was going to a new camp and feeling unsure about himself. I was struggling.

I needed to change my attitude. My attitude needed to be better so Munch could see that despite circumstances and changes in our schedule that we are blessed. Our attitude should be reflective of our spirit. Our spirit is filled with thankfulness. I was the adult so I had to show that to Munch.

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I started by saying, “Wow, it’s a rainy day Munch don’t forget to grab your rain coat.” He did. We got in the car and I said “Let’s thank God for rain because the grass and tress need it.” He smiled. I said “When I was little there were all kinds of stories of why it rained. Some would say that God was crying because we weren’t remembering how to be good people.” I reminded him that we don’t have that problem because we thank Him for everything. We are kind to people.

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I didn’t rush in the rain. I was extra cautious choosing to be positive despite the number of people on the road going 2 miles per hour. Munch began telling me about the Hermit Crab and how it’s not an insect (he’s such a genius). We pulled up in front of the new school where he was going to camp and he said “Wow, that’s a big school. Why is it named after Martin Luther King Jr.?” “Not sure baby. School districts name the schools that they build” I replied.

We got out of the car and walked into the school and headed to the gym where the campers were gathered. Munch held me tighter. I said “It’s only a week Munch and next week begins art camp.” I hugged him and smiled. He entered and saw a counselor from his last camp and said “Mr. Christian, hi. I was over at the other camp. You’re here too?” The counselor smiled and said “Yep, buddy. Good morning. I’m going to be here with you.” Munch smiled.

He relaxed. I relaxed. He was going to be fine.

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A lot of times our attitude about a situation whether it be fear, anger or distress really affects how we feel about things and in turn the day. Our day starts off on the wrong foot. But, it’s not our day that’s the problem. It’s our attitude about the things that we are going through that makes the day seem like hell.

Yes, I hate rainy days because of bad drivers, but I am blessed. Yes, Munch was scared of going to a new camp today, but he recognized one of the counselors from his last camp and relaxed. That’s all we need to do. Relax about things that seem overwhelming. Breathe through the uncertainty and know that it will be okay.

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By shifting our focus on the positive we are able to smile and relax through the rough periods. They will not break you. They may shake up things in your life, but your attitude about the shake-up needs to stay positive. No weapons formed against you shall prosper. So, what are you worried about?

You got this.

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Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links: Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.

Motivational Monday Moment– 7.24.17

Today’s Motivational Monday Moment is about finding your joy in the midst of your storm. I know it’s hard. I know that life can be overwhelming sometimes. I get it. You may be in a transition, a storm or a dang hurricane, but hold on love.

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I need you to hold on and anchor yourself. You need to remember that you can’t control the storm, but don’t let it take your joy. You have to hold on.

I remember going through a rough period four years ago when I ended my marriage. We were in a bad space. I was hurting. He was hurting. I was literally being engulfed in a sea of pain and anger. I was drowning. I had let go of my joy.

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Have you ever literally fallen because of the emotional pain you were experiencing? There was nothing physically wrong with you, but the emotional pain was overwhelming? I have. It is unbelievable.

I would be walking and fall out and start crying. My son was holding my head begging me not to cry. He said “Mommy, don’t cry. I’ll protect you. Mommy, please don’t cry.” I’ll never forget that.

It took everything in me to get beyond the grief that I was experiencing. I was dealing with so much pain and grief at the dissolution of my family structure and how we were treating each other that I thought I was going to lose my mind.

I couldn’t hold on to my joy. It was slipping through my fingers. Until one day…

I literally heard God speak to me and say “Get up! It is done.” 

And just like that I had regained the strength to keep on fighting. To keep on moving forward despite the pain that I found myself in. I was not alone. God reminded me of that. That remembrance of his love and mercy helped me to regain my joy.

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You see God had given me back my joy. But, I’ve strayed. I’ve let life and situations that I find myself in overwhelm me. I allow the hopelessness and pain of my situations choke the joy out of me. Until now.

I am reading everything lately. Nothing is one sided. Where there is darkness there is light. Where there is pain there is joy. The good and bad exist on the same plane. I can take the good, but not the bad, but is that fair?

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Nope. I need to remember re-frame a situation, re-establish boundaries and restructure my outlook on life. My joy doesn’t disappear when there is pain. When there is despair, joy is still there. I have to remember that.

And I want you to remember it too. There is nothing that you are going through that you can’t find and hold on to your joy. You are a vessel of positive light and you are loved. No matter what the situation you find yourself in, please know that you are of value and joy is within you. Don’t despair my friend.

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Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links: Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.

#WisdomWednesday – 7.12.17

God has a way of working things out in your favor while you’re not paying attention.

I’ve been trying to minimize the stress in my life. Choosing to focus on the positives and as my soror always says “Living my happy black life”. That being said things still get to me. I still wonder why some people are intent on bringing me off my mountain top of bliss. But, I won’t let it. I have to keep focused and continue living my life.

It’s on those moments of chaos and discord that God steps in.

I had stopped worrying. I was in a good place. But, God knew that I needed something. That I wanted something. A sign that he’s not forgotten me.

He stepped in and gave that to me. He gave me amazing news like finding out that one of my posts was seen by a stranger that wanted to share it on a website that has over 30 million monthly readers. Woohoo! I was having dinner with Mr. C when I got the message. Talk about God re-shifting my focus. This was amazing and I promise to share more when it gets posted.

I was in this joyful place. Then a couple of days later that bubble burst. More drama. My mind started to shift and wander into a place of unhappiness. I was falling off my mountain top of bliss. I was going into a place of uncomfortable anger and quiet rage.

Then God stepped in.

Again.

I woke up Saturday morning with a woman from Instagram liking all my posts and then following me. She then commented on one of my posts saying “I finally found u! A page on fb that shared a recent blog of mine shared urs too. Girl i love ya work. We need to talk!!” Honestly it freaked me out. Why is this woman wanting to find me? Is she a stalker?

LOL, I’ve become increasingly cautious as I’ve aged. So, I checked out her Instagram page and web page and discovered she is another blogger who has a great website called “Blended and Black” where she is all about trying to create harmony in blended families. Say what now? Yep. I went to her website and was so excited.

God was giving me another aha moment! He was giving me a resource to give me the tools of trying to create a harmonious environment where there isn’t one. I was like “Okay, God. I get it.” And I did. This woman is amazing. I was direct messaging her for most of Saturday morning. You can’t get no better than that. It was like I found a long lost soul sister.

So, my #WisdomWednesday message is meant to inspire you to not give up. No matter what you’re going through or what you’re growing through it will get better. God will re-shift your focus, realign your priorities and help you get back on your mountaintop of bliss.

 

 

Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links: Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.

 

#TuesdayMotivation – 7.11.17

There are many things to be thankful for this awesome Tuesday. Even when days seem the longest and nights the shortest you can always remember that joy is coming. You know that pain and trouble won’t last always. You can and will get through this.

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Tomorrow isn’t promised to any of us so I want to remind you that today, July 11th that there are many things to be grateful and thankful for including that it is 7/11 which means free slurpees at your local 7-Eleven. It is also Amazon Prime Day which means deals on things you’ve been wanting. Ah, it’s going to be a great day after all.

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Happy Tuesday loves!

 

 

Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links: Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.

MOTIVATIONAL MONDAY MOMENT – 7.10.17

Today’s Motivational Monday Moment is about acceptance. Recently, I’ve been asked why I seem so calm about things. I realized that I had changed my attitude and moved from complaining, fear and stressing about my situations and focusing on the acceptance of the choices that I have to make. It was hard. I wasn’t used to this.

But, with acceptance comes peace. You are allowing yourself the opportunity to just accept the way things are and trust that it will be the way it will be. I honestly have to tell you that this works well in my meditation and mindfulness practice. I am not struggling against what things will be. I am adjusting my attitude to accept that I will be okay.

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It’s hard folks. It’s not easy to try and accept things they way they are, but trust me it is freeing.  Think about the failed relationships you’ve had with parents, friends, spouses and/or significant others. Have you tried to get over their wrongs that you felt were caused to you? Did you see value in forgiveness?

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Probably.

But, when they did something else to you it made you mad again right? You realized that they are the same way and they will never change. You get fed up. You get disgusted. You wonder why did you ever trust them again. You doubt you. But, stop it.

There is no need to doubt you. You need to stop expecting anything and just accept the way things are. The way they are. It’s freeing.

That’s where I’m at. You’ve probably known this for a while. But, if not and you’re just like me…let’s stand where we are and just accept.

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We need to have faith that what will be will be. No need to worry about things or people that aren’t conforming. We have to change. We have to change our mindset and realize that we can’t control or change anyone. Just accept things and people where they are.

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Acceptance isn’t a bad thing. It’s an understanding of the things that are surrounding you. Not accepting things and people for who they are means that you are expecting them to be some way. I now get what my best friend Nikki says “You need to stop expecting people to be anything.” I do.

I did.

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Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links: Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.