Sorry for the delay in posting. It has been a hectic week. I’m multi-tasking and getting overwhelmed. Whew! Breathe sis…
Okay, so it is the last month of 2017. It is almost over. Have you completed your goals? Are you struggling? It’s okay either way. You still have time to reach or restructure your goals. Furthermore, now is the time to figure out what you want to accomplish in the new year.
But, I want to caution you on looking to the future and feeling overwhelmed. Don’t! Think about what you accomplished this year and write it down. That will give you a realistic picture about how your goals and/or accomplishments lined up in preparation for your 2018 goals.
I’m excited to say that I had some great accomplishments and I will update you at the end of the month. I would love to know what you’ve accomplished this year as well. Let me know in the comments.
December is one of my favorite months because it is the month before my birthday month and it is the last month of the year. I am excited for Christmas, pageants and concerts. I’m excited for warm drinks, a crackling fire and beautiful Christmas decorations. I’m excited for holiday cheer.
Have an amazing December and a wonderful Friday. You are absolutely loved and appreciated. Until next time.
A Veteran’s Wreath is a wreath that is placed on the headstone of our veterans. It is meant to honor, respect and teach. We honor our Veteran’s by putting the wreath on their headstone. We respect them by saying their names when placing the wreaths and we teach our children the value of service.
Can you please sponsor a wreath this holiday season? My sorority has partnered up with Wreaths Across America to fund raise for wreaths to be placed on the grave sites of the fallen soldiers. We will be placing wreaths for the fallen soldiers on Saturday, December 16th at U.S. Soldier and Airmen’s Cemetery in Washington, DC and we need your help to reach our goal. Our goal is 100 wreaths.
We can reach that goal with your help. We want to cover as many headstones as possible at our location and with your help we can do so. Can you please share this post on your social media feeds? Can you please donate wreaths? You can donate a wreath through our page by clicking here: Wreaths Across America
I truly thank you and appreciate each and every one of you. One wreath for one headstone is $15.00. If I can get 100 of my followers to purchase a wreath we will meet our goal. Can you help?
A profound sense of determination– One of the hardest things for me was a desire to people please and take stuff from people. Not intentionally but just letting the slick stuff slide. The comments from people who were meant to destroy me or break me down hurt like hell. I always took the high road. You know the road where you don’t give in to the foolishness of other folks and don’t engage? But, that left me both mentally and emotionally drained.
I felt overwhelmed by the viciousness and the hate that was being spewed that it literally consumed my spirit. I am a woman of faith and it is hard to keep your faith when you are being attacked by people. I kept praying and trying to be the bigger person, but what happens when you can’t? When you can’t hold in the frustration and the anger that is consuming you. What do you do?
You explode. You lose it. You cry, curse, shout or do whatever to get through the pain and then you figure out a plan. Not the plan on how to kill and get away with murder of your enemies but the plan on how you will not let the naysayers affect your spirit or life with the bull. You become determined to build a wall that they can’t knock down, tear down or blow up with their wickedness. Then you build that wall up and you cover it with purpose and praise because you are determined to not be dragged in the pits of hell where your haters live. You pray. You become determined to take the road of righteousness and surround yourself with prayer partners who keep your name lifted up. That’s what you do because you are determined to live each day better than the last.
So, to recap the 12 gifts that I received this year were:
A forgiving spirit – Let me tell you how many times I’ve held on to the wrongs that people have done to me. I will cut people from my life with a quickness but I never forget the hurt. It takes years. I still feel pain if it is was someone who I was truly close to. But, I realized that there is a time for everything and I have to accept that some people will play major roles during minor times and others will play minor roles during major times and that is okay. It’s seasonal. I need to forgive those that I feel should have stepped up and had my back or just been there for me.
But, I didn’t. I would hold on to that pain. I received a forgiving spirit. I needed to forgive people who had wronged me but more importantly I needed to forgive myself for thinking that I could have done more for them to still be in my life. I learned that it is okay to just let go and be satisfied that it is for the best. A forgiving spirit is a beautiful thing.
Good parenting never stops because you can always have a positive impact on the lives of your children, if you pay attention and employ good thinking.
Loving them no matter what
My divorce was quite unpleasant. After my ex-wife and I separated, my children were upset. One expressed anger and wanted little to do with me. I made clear that I cared and wanted to be in his life. So, over time, that attitude changed.
After some time, we met for dinner. The evening seemed to be going calmly, but then I said something that brought out his anger. I sat and took it. Because I listened to his anger, and continued to be clear that I loved him no matter what, this was a turning point. We have grown much closer ever since that evening.
Holidays are always challenging. Last year, in September, I asked about Thanksgiving. The response was, “I thought you said seeing us on Thanksgiving day was not important to you.” I said that I had feelings that made me realize that was completely true.
However, I backed off and I sent an email saying that, what was really important was to see my children together on any day, regardless of what day was. A few days later, I got an email saying that they wanted to join me for Thanksgiving. Messages like that will bring tears to your eyes!
As an attorney and financial planner, I try to make sure my children plan well. On the other hand, I know saying too much turns into prying into their lives when they are striving to be independent and can make them feel badly, as if they are not doing well or as if I am being critical.
After the divorce, my daughter needed some support from me. I asked if her mother was helping. She said yes, so I never asked again and provided what she said she needed. Much later, I learned that she amassed several thousand dollars in credit card debt during this time. When she told me this, she also told me that she paid it off. Such an impressive accomplishment; you have to be proud of that!
So, the learning on my part never stops, and what I can do to help my children continues!
What an incredible day to be off and just spending time with the family. That is what I did today. I headed to a BBQ thrown by my beautiful nephew’s mommy (Cameron). I had a ball. As I sat there enjoying both my wonderful nephew and my blended and interracial family, I was in awe at how blessed I am. My SILIT (sister in law in training) is not only a phenomenal mother, but a phenomenal person that comes from a great family. How awesome it is that we get to spend guaranteed time off with each other eating and making memories? But, why do we have a Labor Day holiday? I couldn’t recall from U.S. history class in high school where the true origin of Labor Day came from, so I hit the internet. I wanted to find out why the government recognizes Labor Day as a national holiday and you know what? It’s pretty interesting.
Labor Day originated in the late 1800’s, at the height of the Industrial Revolution in the United States. At that time, most people worked 12 hours each day for 7 days straight barely squeaking by. In some states, children as young as 5 or 6 worked in factories earning a fraction of working adult’s wages. Can you imagine that? My munch is 6 and I can’t imagine him working to support the family. Hard times. But, beyond the fact that we were working folks to death and illegally the workers often faced extremely unsafe working conditions.
As manufacturing grew, so did the labor unions. They began organizing strikes and rallies. They were protesting the conditions and arguing for new salaries and hours. Many of the strikes and rallies turned violent. It was on September 5, 1882, 10,000 workers took unpaid time off to march in NYC, holding the first Labor Day parade in U.S. history.
The idea of a “workingmen’s holiday,” celebrated on the first Monday in September, caught on in other industrial centers across the country. However, Congress would not legalize the holiday until 12 years later. Why did they wait 12 years to do it? Economics people! On June 26, the American Railroad Union (the union for all the railroads) called for a boycott of all Pullman railway cars. This boycott inevitably crippled the railroad industry nationwide. Now imagine only having trains and horses to transport your items and now you can’t use the faster of the two. What do you think would happen?
So, in order to end the strike, the federal government stepped in and released troops. This only made things worse because riots happened and more than a dozen workers were killed. So, the government attempted to repair ties with the workers and Congress passed an act making Labor Day a legal holiday in the District of Columbia and the territories. Cool huh? Many thanks to labor unions for organizing and requiring better wages and working conditions and many thanks to Congress for recognizing our labor.