Motivational Monday Moment – 4/17/2017

It’s the beginning of a new week and I wanted to share my Motivational Monday Moment with you. Today’s Motivational Monday Moment is about success. Success takes many different forms and I bet we’re all successful in one way or another. It’s hard not to be. But, what are the things that you’re doing to be successful or stay successful?

when-you-want-to-succeed-as-bad-as-you-want-to-breathe-then-you-will-be-successful

Success (n) the favorable or prosperous termination of attempts or endeavors; the accomplishment of one’s goals.

Success can be whatever goals you’re striving for. No one said success will happen overnight, but don’t overlook the small successful steps that you make. Sometimes the small steps matter more. It’s about fearlessly pursuing your goals. Whatever they may be. You have to believe that you can and you will.

6ba783fea4134c099a78015e5ae56a87

Sometimes the journey will lead you down many different paths and roads but you just keep going. Your blessing is on the horizon. Your success is going to manifest itself in ways you could have never imagined. No matter what you’re going through, any setback is only a set-up for the success that you have on the horizon.  Success isn’t overnight. It’s a process. Whatever you’re going through you have to know that you can’t give up.

arthurashe1

Giving up sometimes seems the easiest thing to do, but when you’re running your race to accomplish your goals you can’t be distracted. You can’t give up! So, what you have to self-publish your book instead of getting a big publishing house to pick it up. You wrote that book right? So, what you didn’t get the job you wanted with the salary you thought you needed. You have a job right? Sometimes our failures only propel us to be more determined in reaching our goals.

successful-quotes-8

We have to become super motivated to reach our goals. We can’t allow distractions to deter us from being what we want to be. Prime example:  I want to write my own book.  The thing is that I can’t seem to find the time or motivation to do so. I’ve started drafts and I never finish them. I doubt my talents. I find excuses.

success-occurs-when-your-dreams-are-bigger-than-your-excuses-quote-1.jpg

I have a million and one things going on. I’m passionate about a lot of things. I’m thankful for everything that I have and everything that I can do. But, something the pastor said at church yesterday reminded me that I have to get to writing. I have to make time for my dreams. Not because I’m afraid of failing. Lord knows that I’ve failed enough times in my life. But, because I’m afraid of succeeding.

a62a169834a4ac65774d60f6d9c9c636

I know it seems weird. But, that’s my fear. Being a successful writer and having to do it full-time. I love my job. I love my career. I love the many things that I have going on. Do I really want to stop doing them? No.

unnamed

So, I stall. I make excuses. I find ways to not “share my talent” as my pastor said yesterday. But, not today. I’m motivated to know that I have to be determined and not lazy. I have to push through with writing my book because my passion is telling my story.

e3cae6122e483375e3cbeef46ec7dc8f--famous-quotes-about-success-famous-failures

I need you to do the same. Let’s push forward and focus on being successful in whatever we want to do. Celebrate the small successes and keep going. Don’t stop. Success is not making excuses and doing what you want. Reach into your spirit and let your fire burn and let’s make it happen. My Motivational Moment is telling you that success is within your reach. Let’s get it!

30dbd7b8a82bede44e39932a2dcf7c04

Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links: Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.

Advertisements

Interviewing: 5 Things To Do

I recently concluded interviews for an available position on my team and thought…Wouldn’t it be great to give prospective candidate tips on what to do when interviewing? Yep. So, that’s what inspired this post.

I last interviewed in May of last year so I’m relatively new to the job and can speak from personal experience on what you should do when interviewing. I’m a big proponent of number 5, but trust me that I know and think about all these items. Here’s my list of 5 Things To Do When Interviewing.

  1. Don’t Wear Lipstick and Not Check Your Teeth. Okay, you may be laughing and think that this doesn’t happen, but more often than not it does. I love a good lipstick. Remember my red lip in NYC on date night with Mr. C? But, if you wear lipstick on an interview, make sure that it doesn’t rub off on your teeth. Check your teeth and blot your lips before going on an interview. I’m so distracted if you talk and all I see is your front teeth covered in lipstick. Personally, I tend to wear a light gloss on an interview, but if you don’t make sure you’re interview ready by doing a grooming check.
  2. Don’t Wear Loud Colors. Things have definitely changed from when I graduated college and interviewed. Women can wear pant suits instead of a skirt set. I love that. More flexibility. But, please stick to the basic colors of suits when interviewing. The basics are: black, brown, tan, grey and blue. Please don’t do a red, turquoise or orange suit on an interview unless you are interviewing in an environment where that would be acceptable.
  3. Check your hygiene. I’m not just referring to taking a shower that morning and washing your body, I’m speaking of any strong scents. If you’re a smoker and you smoke, please know that nothing you can do will cover that scent. If you smoke in your house or car, you will smell that smoke in your clothes and it will linger in every room you enter whether you know that or not. That scent is not pleasant. The smell of smoke can be nauseating combine it with the fact that your interviewer may have allergies and you’ve just indicated that they will be allergic to you. Be considerate.
  4. Proofread your application/resume. Most employers require you to submit your resume through an on-line portal. Please make sure that your application is free of misspellings or typos. This is a big no-no. Print it out and review it before clicking submit. If you are applying for an analyst job, how can we trust you to be analyze data and your resume has typos? Take the time to be thorough.
  5. Sell yourself. This is probably one of the hardest things for people to do, but the most important. You need to be able to sell yourself in an interview. Talk about what you do and your accomplishments. Make sure they align with the job. Know what you’re talking about, but you have to be able to sell yourself by letting us know what you bring to the table. How can we know if you can do the job if you don’t talk about your accomplishments in the interview?  We won’t.

So, those are my tips. What are some of the things you would recommend to interviewers?

 

Want to keep in touch? You can find me on social media at the following links: Twitter @mskeeinmd, Facebook page A Thomas Point of View and my Instagram page https://www.instagram.com/mskeeinmd/.

MIA Update – June 27th

Hey Everyone!

How ya’ll doing? I’m taking it back to my Southern Roots and giving you a little taste of the South. Lol. I’ve missed you guys so much. I’m sorry I haven’t written. It has been crazy busy these last few days at my new job.

I have to say I love it! I was unsure of how the team would receive me. I was a little apprehensive about what I would encounter, but one thing that I’ve always said is that God ordered my steps.

He totally ordered my steps on this position. This position was something that he thought that I could do so I have embraced it. I’ve accepted it and I’m so excited that He’s given me wonderful wonderful women to mentor and to lead. My team is all women. Lol. Not surprising in Human Resources though.

I’m ready to help develop, motivate and encourage them so that we can be a strong team. A united team. I have so many ideas. I’m loving who they are as women and who are they who they are as individuals.

I’m meeting with each of them individually this week to begin discovering who they are, what they do, what they would like to do and where they think they need help. I let them know that we did get another head count in the department so I’m super excited about that. So were they. I’ve already jumped in and made some recommendations, learned a lot of information and scheduled meetings with the vendors. I’m all about vendor management. I’m extremely excited about what lies ahead.

Mr. C is mad at me because I haven’t written in the past week. But, as I explained to him it’s been a lot on my plate between traveling and getting used to my new job but I’m trying to get back on schedule. So, I’m asking you guys to give me a couple of weeks. Last week was one and this is my second week where I probably will not write as much but I will try to go in and reblog out some pieces that I read.

So, please bear with me. I’m going to try my best to catch up with everyone’s posts as much as I can. July is a busy month. I’m getting ready for my trip to Miami in a couple of weeks, 4th of July is my son’s soccer banquet and my church’s homecoming picnic is the next weekend and my niece’s graduation party two weeks later. I’m trying to make sure that I am not spreading myself too thin and being available for dates with Mr. C, seeing my son obviously, my job and my girlfriends.

I’ve been neglecting my girlfriends because I’ve been so busy you know co-parenting, Munch’s school situation, my move and his birthday party that I’ve sort of neglected that girl time. That girl time is so important when it comes to friendships so I’m trying to get back on track.

Last week was super good because I was able to get in touch with a couple of girlfriends and play catch up. A couple of weeks before that I was able to have a couple of more dinners. This week I have my son and with his busy schedule it’s going to be really interesting. Bear with me. I will be tweeting and reblogging some great reads.

Again I’m sorry that I haven’t been around but I wish all of you much success and I know your writing is phenomenal. I will ask that if you have some great reads that you think I would enjoy that I’ve missed please post them at the end of this post because I really would love to read them and I may go ahead and reblog them out to my readers. Thank you guys for all of your continued support on my posts, talking to me and encouraging me. You guys really do not know how much I really love that it is a sisterhood, a brotherhood and a bloggerhood. It’s family and I thank you for everything.

Kisses!

I Like Control, But So What!

I mean doesn’t everyone like to take control of their life and plans and not just leave it to chance that they will be able to eat, live and have a career? I’ve been often told that I’m predictable. That I follow a set pattern when it comes to making plans and don’t tend to deviate from those said plans. Yep, and what’s the problem with that?

No, I’m not spontaneous. No, I don’t like surprises and no, I don’t tend to go somewhere on the whim. I am neurotic and my friends know and accept this about me (which they should because they are my friends) and they will let me know in advance of parties, play dates or drinks. I love that. If it’s not on my calendar, the likely hood of it happening are slim and none. Does it freak me out when I meet someone who doesn’t like to make plans? Absolutely.

But, I can’t change them. I want someone who will meet me halfway. Know that I like to plan and sometimes plan something or allow me to plan it. Yep, it sounds creepy and controlling, but it’s not. It’s just allowing me to feel comfortable about our plans. Heck, I just planned a getaway to NJ in January with my bestfriend to go to this restaurant that has over 30 different grilled cheese sandwiches. Yep, I’m a foodie who plans her food jaunts.

I probably should be in therapy about my need to feel in control, but I can save myself lots of money and time wasted because I know what the issue is…Lack of control happens when people don’t plan. Families break up. You go hungry. You can’t afford anything. You can’t afford doctor’s visits. You can’t afford extracurricular activities. You eat free and reduced lunch.

You grow up. You make great choices. You vowed to live each day better than the last. You control what you can around you. You control your life.

But, what happens when you lose control? What happens when things fall apart that you thought were supposed to work because you took the time, did the research, resolved and analyzed the outliers and it still fails?

You cry. You scream. You accept the inevitable.

You move forward. You grow. You make it through.

You create a new path. A new plan. You research, analyze and test your hypothesis knowing that it is all trial and error.

control

Truth: Success is Possible

“I’m a success today because I had a friend who believed in me and I didn’t have the heart to let him down.”

― Abraham Lincoln

I love this quote. I think it sort of captures how I feel. I am afraid of success. Not failure. I think the possibility of disappointing those that love and believe in me sort of keeps me from stretching beyond my comfort zone. I’ve heard for years, how I’m good at this or good at that, but what if my friends are just being overly generous because of their love for me? Would I be a disappointment if I actually was a success? Think about all the one hit wonders and how they thought they would become a multi-million dollar franchise only to flop on their next album.

It’s pressure to be on top and more pressure to stay on top. So, what do you do? If you’re me, you stall, drag your feet and believe that maybe you shouldn’t do what your heart, voice and spirit are telling you to do. You delay yourself in the “what if” stage. Who’s guilty of that? Me! I am so guilty of thinking what if. What if I’m really not as good as my friends think? What if no one likes my stuff? What if I can’t pull off that big presentation? What if I stumble over my words and fumble the entire speech? What if…

What if’s hold you back from understanding your true potential because instead of pushing forward to your destiny and utilizing the best you, YOU get caught up in a trap of your own disbelief. You question whether or not what is happening is real or should it be real. You question whether or not you can actually change your environment or get out of your own way because so many people have tried and failed to do so. You actually hold up and hold hostage your gift out of fear.

Sound familiar? It’s my story. I’m not alone though. Hollywood has made many movies where people actually do the same thing and then have a moment of clarity and want to change. Think “Baby Boy – 2001”. Wasn’t Jody a grown man who was in essence a baby boy? Fear of growing up had stalled his ability to be a man and take care of his responsibilities. How about my all time favorite movie “Purple Rain – 1984”? Wasn’t the Kid’s whole issue was fear of failing because his dad never got his “big break” and his family life was jacked up? Let’s not forget the movie, “Cocktail – 1988” which is where I fell in love with Tom Cruise. The main character, Brian, had high aspirations, but gets sidetracked in foolery and then hesitates to believe that he can actually accomplish his goals. The main underlying theme in all these films is simple: Fear.

Fear of success, failure, standing out, etc. They feared something. We all do. We fear being happy so we sabotage our relationships. We fear abandonment, so we don’t form close bonds with anyone out of fear that they will leave. We fear love, so we block ourselves off from people and become guarded so no one can break down that wall. We fear success because standing out in a crowd and having people shower accolades on you is scary.

My fear is your fear. It’s hard because I have faith and faith and fear can’t coexist right? You have to choose. So, I’m choosing my faith. I’m remembering like it says in Hebrews 11:6 (NRSV) “And without faith it is impossible to please God, for whoever would approach him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him.” I believe. Faith of a mustard seed right? I need to remember that. From this day forward I am taking my life back and claiming this…I will not fear my own strength or success because I have faith. Faith that God will have my back.

Still not convinced how God can do it? Well, how about this powerful quote from Marianne Williamson.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of “A Course in Miracles”

Be blessed and remember this my loves…

1978421_10152112421437585_3441108193370520448_o

Competing Women

I’m like that old cartoon Pinky and the Brain where every time the show ended, Pinky would ask the Brain, “Brain, what do you want to do tonight?” The Brain would always smile and say “The same thing we do every night Pinky. Try to take over the world.”

I grew up in the late 80’s and early 90’s where sisterhood seemed to go together like pop rocks and soda pop. My girls were the ones that I would whisper my secrets too, share my clothes and my dreams with. Girlfriends were essential to my development. But, something changed. Girls became competitive and we stopped wanting each other to win. We became catty women and clique-ish. What happened to this sisterhood? Was it just a part of “getting older”?

Early on, I learned to realize the true meaning of a friend. It was at the precious age of 13, when I commented to my girlfriend that I was jealous of another girl in our class. She was prettier, thinner and all the boys seemed to like her. My girl replied (in her 13 year old logic), “There is never reason to be jealous of another person. No one has something you can’t get on your own.” I loved that. True, simple and to the point. That has been one of my guiding principles. Making sure to never be jealous of anyone else, much less my girlfriends who provide a circle of love around me.

That guiding principle never sheltered me from the fact that there were and will always be “mean girls”, but when did the mean girls become the norm? Has the evolution of social media allowed the “nice girls” an opportunity to come out of their shell and display their true characteristics? Over the years women have gained an independent and competitive nature when it comes to dealing with each other. That nature is seemingly disintegrating the bonds of sisterhood. We are no longer concerned about making it collectively, but rather individually. How many times have you looked in on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram or read the latest social media posting about women and their catty comments? There are all kinds of memes dedicated to disrespecting women, like this one here:

a6v4xu

Women have become back bitters and cunning in our desire to destroy each other. Oftentimes it is over a male. Think back to your high school years when girls would use passive/aggressive techniques to try to win the eye of a particular boy. What about the fights that broke out at school over boys? What about the “slut shaming” women do to each other now? How many times have women created rumors to try and demean and demoralize other women? The advancement of social technology has allowed the anonymity of girls who just want to be mean. But why the competition?

In a New York Times article, John Tierney said “intrasexual competition” is the most important factor explaining the pressures that young women feel to meet standards of sexual conduct and physical appearance.

So, women are pressured and that allows us to react as such? Isn’t pressure just a part of life? Why do we continue to drive a wedge between each other in hopes of getting noticed? I don’t buy it. Are we really that desperate that we don’t realize the fundamental truth that we are only in competition with ourselves? Why are you trying to compete with other women? Compete against yourself to be the best you that you can be. Learn like I did, “No one has something you can’t get on your own.” Hard work, dedication, determination and drive are words that should be placed in your own mental vocabulary and applied to your own quest for world domination.

Last year, my niece was a victim of the “mean girl” mentality when she was three way called and said something about another girl. My sister told her that it was her fault and that she was wrong because she shouldn’t have said anything about anyone on the telephone that you wouldn’t have said in person. My niece was hurt and my sister said, “You can’t trust females”. I was mortified. I told my sister that you can’t tell her that. You can’t tell her not to trust women. Women are the backbone of this society and your girlfriends are your biggest supporters. I simply told my niece that you have to be selective in the women that you allow in your circle, but friendships take time to develop. Observe and evaluate a person’s true motive and understand that EVERYONE has an agenda. Your charge is to find out if it is FOR YOU or AGAINST YOU.

But, I questioned whether or not I was hurting or helping her with my advice? I have been the recipient of friendship from some incredible women. We laugh, cry, drink and share. It’s a bond that has evolved over time. We are there for each other and they encourage and listen to me. There is no jealousy, envy or hate towards our success. There is no competition. Just acceptance. Whether it be “My marriage is ending, I need some advice? to “OMG, Infertility treatments worked! I’m pregnant!” They have been the rock in which I’ve leaned and relied on. Good times and bad they are the reason that I’m not in a mental institution now. Love. They love me and I love them. So, truth: We need each other. We need our girlfriends. Stop competing and start developing sound friendships.

girlfriends